Extinguished Flames
by Half Demon Alchemist
Summary: Edward lost his will to live. The night started off normally enough. He was going to the library, but he was stopped by Roy and raped. But since when did the colonel call him "Fullmetal Pipsqueak"? Something was wrong, because Roy would never do this to him. Roy may just be the only one to help him, because Envy left a few deep scars... Scars he will have to help heal himself.
1. The Foreboding Feeling

**My first M rated story, sorry if it sucks.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA!**

**_Warnings: None for this chapter, but there will rape in the next chapter._**

**This story will have mature content, and if you can't handle it then please, for your sake and mine, get the fuck off this page. I appreciate it. I'd rather not get flames because you didn't listen to my warnings. So please, I told you, this has rape in it. So, if you don't want to read it, or can't handle it, click the back button.**

**If you do read this, please review.**

**Chapter One:**

_The Foreboding Feeling_

It had been a long day. A very long, tiring day. All Edward Elric wanted to do was go back to his dorm, eat, and then sleep. But first, he needed to go pick up a alchemy book from the library. A new book, just came in. The librarians and himself were on good terms, seeing as he visited there so much, so they all made sure that when a new alchemy book came along, they'd contact him.

So here he was, trudging along the sidewalks in Central, a suit of armor, that was his younger brother, clanking behind him.

"Brother? Are you sure we shouldn't just get it tomorrow?" Al's meek voice echoed out of the armor.

"No, Al. I told you, what if this gives us a lead on how to get your body back? I'm not risking the chance of letting the book get in to someone else's hands." Ed paused for a moment before adding "Besides I'm not tired. I'm not even hungry."

Edward's stomach chose that specific moment to let out a growl.

Both brothers sweat-dropped.

Alphonse persisted."But, brother! I know you're hungry!"

"Fine Al, if you want to make sure I'm not dying of starvation or whatever, go back to the dorm and make me some food, for when I return from the library."

The younger pondered this for a second, before asking "Brother, are you sure I should leave?"

The elder groaned. "Yeah, Al go on, I'll be there soon, just make sure I have some hot food waiting for me okay."

Alphonse would have smiled, had he been able to. "Yes brother, I'll make you stew."

Ed just turned his golden head back to face the armor and smiled. "Thanks, Al."

The younger Elric turned and walked the opposite direction, clanking with each step. The armored boy had a feeling, call it instinct, that something bad... no, _horrible_ was going to happen. Something... traumatic... and... terrifying.

But all Alphonse could do was walk on, and continue to the small dorm he and his older brother shared.

His feeling was right. He should have never left his brother.

* * *

Ed walked on, determined to get that new book from the library. For Al's sake. But each step he took, just made him want to turn around and crawl back to his dorm to sleep.

He didn't have a good feeling about this. Being out here, alone. Instinct. Intuition. Whatever you want to call it, Edward had a feeling. And when the Elric's get a bad feeling, something bad always happens. _Always._

Now, all he could do, was wait for whatever awful thing that was bound to happen, happen.

* * *

Alphonse knew he shouldn't worry. After all, it was his big brother that he was talking about, of course he'd be fine without Al...

But still, the foreboding feeling did not leave. Maybe... he'd call colonel Mustang...

No. He'd give his older brother the benefit of the doubt... and wait for Ed to return. Ed always returned... So what made this time any different?

A lot of things, Alphonse. A lot of things were different this time.

* * *

Edward was growing impatient. With himself. He just wanted to go to the fucking library. But, there was a huge crowd blocking the way he usually walked to get there.

"Stupid fucking car accidents." the angry blonde muttered bitterly to himself. Right now, to Edward, it didn't matter that there was a life threatening car accident. Well, when it was blocking the way to get to his precious library, anyway.

Ed turned back the way he came, looking for another route. There was no way in hell he was returning to his younger brother without that book.

He passed an alleyway. Doing a double-take, he noticed that by going through this long, dark, creepy, secluded alleyway, he could get to the library. But his Elric senses were going hay-wire.

'_This alley... what is it about it that makes me want to turn and run? I don't trust the vibes I get from this place... but if I need to cut through here to get to the library, I will. For Alphonse.'_

Pushing the eerie feeling down, Edward started his march down the concrete path. It reminded him of the alley he and Scar had fought in.

The sky was getting darker by the second, by the time he was halfway through, he could barely see the end of the path, were the alley merged with a street that was close to the Central library.

Ed stopped for a moment. The feeling he had. The awful, horrible, despicable feeling he had, it felt like it was radiating from this alleyway.

Ignoring the feeling once more, he was about to continue on his way, when a all too familiar voice called out behind him.

"Hey there, Fullmetal."

_TO BE CONTINUED!_

_**Hey! Sorry this chapter is really short! I promise the next one will be longer! **_

_**I will be posting the next chapter soon!**_

_**Review please!**_


	2. The Flame That Went Out

**Read and Review!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA**

**WARNING: This chapter contains rape.**

**This is my first lemon/rape/ sexual scene. Sorry if it sucks, I will try to get better.**

**As I said before, if you can't handle rape, then click the back button.**

**Chapter Two:**

_The Flame That Went Out_

"Hey colonel... what are you doing here? I thought that you'd still be at work, with Hawkeye using you as target practice..." Ed asked.

The blonde had to admit, it was really suspicious, the colonel bastard out here... in the middle of an alley... at night... during work hours. Okay, now Edward was positive that either, this wasn't Roy Mustang, or something really bad is about to happen... or both...

The man, who looked exactly like Roy... but there was something wrong. He knew that wasn't Roy. It was the walk. The real Roy walked confidently, like he was the king of everything. But this Roy... walked lazily, shoulders were slumped and his back wasn't straight. It wasn't Roy.

"It's been a while, Fullmetal." The voice was Roy's, but that still wasn't the real colonel.

Ed needed proof. He had to trick this impostor into tripping up. "We saw each other this morning, colonel bastard." Now, if this was really Mustang, he would say that they did _not_ see each other this morning (because they hadn't, this was Ed's day off) and a short joke to even out the bastard remark.

"Ah, yes, Fullmetal, sorry my memory must be lacking. I didn't take my afternoon nap as I normally do." The impostor smirked.

Ed had to admit, that was a nice touch with the nap, considering that's what Mustang does. But it was obvious. That was not Roy Mustang. First: Agreed they had seen each other this morning, when they had not. Two: They apologized. '_Haha, like that bastard would ever apologize...'_. And third: No short joke.

This was not the colonel bastard Ed had gotten to know over the years. This was a fake Roy Mustang. But who was it really?

"Who are you?"

The impostor made their face, that looked like Roy's, twist into confusion. "What are you talking about, Fullmetal Pipsqueak?"

Oh. Dear. God. There was only one person, no, _thing, _in the entire universe that called him Fullmetal Pipsqueak. Envy. Ed was mentally cursing himself. How could he have not realized it sooner? Edward, decided to play along with Envy's game.

"Oh, wow, sorry colonel. I have no idea what I'm talking about... I'm pretty tired... I think I'm going to head back now." Edward turned to leave, hoping he had some luck and that nothing more would come of this encounter.

But then again, when had he ever been lucky?

He felt a hand on his flesh wrist. "Fullmetal, I did not dismiss you."

Ed scowled, and decided to play it off like he would with the real colonel. "It's my day off, I don't have to wait to be dismissed. Now let go, bastard."

The blonde tried to yank his left wrist free of the homunculus's grasp, but to no avail. Envy still had a tight grip.

"Maybe I don't want you to leave yet, Fullmetal Pipsqueak." Envy's whisper was full of lust, and it sounded strange- almost pleasant- coming from the voice of the colonel.

"Come on, colonel, we both know you don't like me."

Next thing Ed knew, he was pinned to the ground with "Roy" straddling his waist.

"W-what are you doing..." Ed mumbled.

Envy's mouth split into a shit eating grin. It looked wrong seeing that on Roy's face.

"Isn't it obvious?" Envy tone was like a kid opening presents on Christmas. "I'm-" Envy trailed his hand down Ed's chest. "Going to-" The hands went lower on the blondes toned stomach "-Break you."

'_Break me? What the hell does that mea-'_

Ed sucked in a gulp of air. The hand the looks like Roy's was currently touching Ed's dick through the leather pants.

"Well, this won't do it all." Envy scolded "You are far to over-dressed, Fullmetal."

With that, Envy/Roy ripped the pants off. The homunculus was strong, so ripping pants was nothing.

"There, there, Fullmetal." Envy whispered, hands stroking the teen's manhood.

Ed hissed in pain, for Envy's grip was painfully tight. The blonde wasn't used to this kind of attention.

The homunculus leaned in close to Ed's face. "I can't let you have all the fun, my pet." Then Envy closed the small gap between them, crushing Envy's and Ed's lips together harshly.

It was painful for Edward. His lips were getting crushed, and he was disgusted. He needed to fight back! He couldn't let this happen to him!

Envy thrust his tongue forcefully through Ed's lips. Edward wanted to bite the pink appendage off.

"Now it's my turn, pet."

'_who the hell does he think he's talking to! I AM NOT HIS FUCKING PET!'_

Before Ed could react, both automail limbs were ripped from his body, making him emit a agony filled scream. Envy took this advantage of Ed's mouth being open, and shoved his own dick in Ed's mouth.

Ed hadn't even seen him undress. But it was awful, seeing your superior officer do this to you. Even though it wasn't Roy, It still hurt.

Roy's voice. Roy's face. Roy's body. Roy's hand. It was terrifying.

"Fullmetal, what are you waiting for?" Roy's obsidian eyes glared at him. "As your superior office, no your _master, _I order you to... suck it."

Edward's golden eyes widened. He couldn't do that. Not to Ro- Envy. That was repulsive. He couldn't do it.

Envy didn't like the answer no. He grabbed Ed's golden hair and yanked it forward, forcing Ed to deep throat the homunculus's dick.

It was painful. Envy was currently laughing as he forced the teen to swallow his member. Envy pushed farther into Ed's warm mouth, making Edward gag. Envy continued to fuck the blonde's mouth roughly.

Roy/Envy was moaning in pleasure of Edward's blow job. But truth be told, Ed wasn't actually doing anything, besides trying to move away from the sex crazed homunculus. Envy was doing all the work, by pulling Ed's hair back and forth, forcing Ed's head to move the same way, thus giving Envy a blow job.

Edward tasted something vile in his mouth. Then the teen realized, to his absolute horror, that Envy/Roy had just come in his mouth. The blonde wanted to spit out the vile, sticky substance, but Envy/Roy would have none of that.

"Swallow it, you useless little whore! You're such a slut, you want to swallow it don't you!? Swallow!"

Edward felt as if he could cry. For two reasons. One, Envy was... raping him. Two, he never wanted to hear Roy's voice say such awful things to him. It hurt...

He reluctantly swallowed. Envy laughed maniacally. "You are a slut! Oh this is rich! Pipsqueaks a slut!"

Ed knew this wasn't Roy. But, what if it was? What if this was Roy? It looked like him... sounded like him... So maybe-

'_NO! THAT'S NOT ROY! THAT'S ENVY! MUSTANG WOULD NEVER DO THIS!' _his mind screamed.

"Well, my little pet whore, time to pleasure me..."

'_Pleasure? What the hell is he going to do to m-'_

Envy... or was it Roy? Gave a strong tug to his wrist, and he fell forward. The man who looked like Roy... Ed didn't know what to call him anymore, they were so similar looking... his mind was getting fuzzy. The man, positioned himself behind Ed.

"Stop! What are you doing! Get away from me you bastard!" Ed shrieked.

Edward was praying, to whatever God was up there, that this wasn't what he thought it was. Envy gave a sudden thrust into Ed. Hard. Without any from of lubrication, or preparation.

The violated teen screamed in agony. It hurt. Really hurt. He couldn't stop screaming. Hell, he preferred automail surgery to this.

"STOP!" Ed screeched. But Envy did not relent. Or wait for Edward to adjust to his rather large size.

Envy thrust back and forth, and the blonde could see stars. He was helpless. He was getting violated, in the worst way. His automail limbs were gone. He couldn't even fight back.

He felt warm liquid pooling on the ground next to him. Blood. His blood. Blood of an innocent, a virgin.

"Oi, chibi... you got such a tight, virgin ass..." Envy moaned.

It made Fullmetal sick. He could taste the bile in his throat. Sickening. He was broken. Broken beyond repair.

With a final thrust, the homunculus came, inside of Ed. Edward screamed at the pain.

"Well, I finally found something you didn't screw up... I mean, you screwed up your mother, your brother and everything else. At least you didn't ruin my fun."

Envy caressed his tan face. Obsidian eyes bored into his lifeless golden orbs.

Ed felt he had nothing left. His father left, his mother was dead, His brother's body was gone, his limbs were gone. One of the only things he had left... was just taken from him.

No one would want him now. No one, he had nothing left of value. Nothing to give.

* * *

Alphonse was growing worried. Really worried. It'd been hours since his brother had left. Ed has said he's be right back. Ed never broke his promises. Not the promises he made to Al.

That was it. Al had waited long enough. He was calling colonel Mustang.

He picked up the phone and dialed the office number.

"Hello, Lieutenant Colonel Roy Mustang speaking."

"Hello, colonel! It's Alphonse." He couldn't help it, his voice was full of panic.

"What's wrong Alphonse?"

"It's brother! He hasn't come home!"

"What do you mean..."

"He went to the library hours ago! He promised he would come home right after! He promised! Brother doesn't break promises!" The panic escalated in his voice.

"Okay Alphonse, we'll go search right now, just calm down."

"Thank you colonel, see you soon."

"Goodbye Alphonse."

* * *

Envy dressed himself, then looked down at the motionless, naked Edward.

"Thanks for the fuck, pipsqueak."

Envy changed from Roy, back into his real, palm tree looking form.

"I'll be sure to fuck you again... real soon, pipsqueak."

The homunculus left the alleyway.

And Edward was left there. He was the flame that went out.


	3. Falling Apart At The Seams

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**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA**

**Warnings: None for this chapter**

**Sorry, this is short...**

**Chapter Three:**

_Falling Apart At The Seams_

Roy and his subordinates were racing through the town, searching every nook and cranny. It was getting late. No Fullmetal. Al was going in hysterics, and Riza was desperately trying to calm the armor down, but her attempts were in vain. Nothing could come Alphonse down. Nothing besides his big brother.

They'd searched everywhere. No Edward Elric.

"Sir, should we keep looking?" Vato asked

"We will keep looking until we find him." Roy ordered.

"Yes, sir." Vato saluted, then ran away to go search for the missing blonde.

Roy was close to panicking. Where was Ed? He had searched everywhere besides... the downtown area... near the library...

The colonel connected the dots. Alphonse had said they Ed was going to the library, right?

He raced down the streets, boots clacking the cobblestone streets. He was panting and gasping for air by the time he made it there.

He looked around. Nothing. No blonde alchemist.

Roy turned his head from side to side, desperately trying to catch a glimpse of gold or red.

Wait, back up... was that an alleyway? Roy walked up to the entrance of the foreboding alley. It was dark. It was long. It was secluded.

Roy didn't hesitate to run down there, as fast as his legs could carry him. He was halfway when his feet came to a halt, and he almost threw up on the spot.

There was Ed. Unconscious. Bleeding. Naked. And there was a sticky, creamy white substance coating the teen and his body...

_'Oh my God. No, don't tell me that happened to Edward. Not Edward.'_

Roy ran to the small teen. Cradling the boy in his arms, he used one gloved hand and grabbed the flare gun in the holster.

_Bang. Bang._ Two shots fired into the night sky.

The code was one shot, found Edward and he's fine. Two shots meant found Edward and he's injured severely, come quick. And three shots... three shots meant he was dead.

The colonel wrapped Edward's favorite red coat around him, even though it was ripped, just to give the poor boy modesty.

There was a rush of loud, clanking steps on the cobblestone. But Roy was paying attention to the unconscious blonde in his arms.

"S-sir? That's not... Edward is it?" Riza's concerned voice echoed in the alleyway.

Roy stood up, positioning Ed to fit better in his arms. "It is..." Roy's voice trailed.

"We need to get him to a hospital... NOW!" The colonel yelled.

Riza saluted and ran off to go get the car.

Roy continued to cradle the broken boy.

The first lieutenant pulled the car up to a stop by the end of the alley, the tires screeching with the quick brake.

The raven haired man wasted no time bolting into the vehicle.

In silence, they drove to the Central hospital.

* * *

Edward wanted to open his eyes. He did. But he couldn't. It felt as if someone was forcing them down, with weights.

Winning the battle with his eyes, he opened his golden eyes suddenly.

And regretted it.

There was a blinding light around him. And god, did it give him a massive headache.

Edward groaned loudly. He was in desperate need of water.

"Edward?!" A familiar voice called out.

"Y-yeah?" Ed shakily replied.

"BROTHER!" Al's voice echoed in the armor.

Ed tried to sit up, really he did try. But as soon as he attempted, there was a sharp pain in his lower half... he just couldn't remember why...

"W-water?" Edward's raspy voice asked.

"Of course." That voice... it was familiar...

There was a glass of clear water in his face. Edward hastily took it... with only one arm, he noted.

He quickly drank it, the cool liquid like heaven to his dry throat.

Edward was about to hand back the empty glass...

But unpleasant memories came flashing back as soon as he saw who handed him the water. The owner to the familiar voice.

Roy Mustang.

Where had he last seen him?

Alley. Alley...

And all the memories were back.

He screamed. Edward hastily withdrew his hand, which was stretched out with the empty glass, causing him to lose his grip on the cup and send the cup plummeting to the the marble floor, shattering to a million pieces.

Just like his heart.

The glass could never, ever be repaired.

Just like him.

The glass was broken, never to be used or wanted again.

Just like him.

The glass was broken beyond repair.

Just like him.

He was made of glass...

Edward was...

Falling apart at the seams.

_TO BE CONTINUED!_

**Review!**

**Hope you liked it!**

**Next chapter will be posted soon!**


	4. Yes, Surely Not

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**Dedicated to: PaytonPride!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA!**

**Chapter Four:**

_Yes, Surely Not_

Riza and the other subordinate burst into the room, Riza's gun loaded and in ready position. Edward was screaming... but why?

"Please! Please don't! I don't want it! Stop! Please! Stop it! Don't do it again! I promise I'll be a good pet!" Edward pleaded, crystal tears coursing down his face.

"M-Master?"**(1)** Edward said softly, looking at Roy.

The man in question was shocked to say the least. '_Master? When did I become his Master?'_

"Fullmetal, calm down. What are you talking about? What do you mean Master?"

Now it was Ed's turn to look confused. The tears were still streaming out of his lifeless golden eyes. But he managed to explain. "What are _you_ talking about Master? You had me call you Master... in... the... alley..."

The translucent liquid poured down the teens tan cheeks. Never ending rivers.

"What do you mean in the alley? Roy wasn't in the alley with you." Riza asked calmly.

Edward turned his teary dull golden eyes to Riza. "H-Hawkeye? M-Master... he said in the alley... to call him master... When he... when he..."**  
**

A new set of tears came flooding down his young face. Edward, having finally managed to sit up, no matter how much pain it caused him, looked down at his white bed sheet.

Riza, realizing that Roy wouldn't be able to talk to the traumatized teen, decided to take matters into her own hands.

"Edward?" The boy looked up at his name. "What did... Master... do to you?"

The blonde spoke without hesitation. "He was punishing me... Master said he was... breaking me... I-I didn't want him to!"

That means... what they had all feared... was true... The Fullmetal Alchemist... was raped...

"Edward? Who did it to you? Who is Master?"

"H-him." Edward said softly, pointing to the colonel.

"E-Edward... there must be some mistake... the colonel couldn't have done it..."

Ed wore a serious expression. "It was him."

Roy was in shock. He didn't do it. He was in a meeting. He would never do that to Edward, not without his consent. He didn't do it!

"B-but the colonel was with me all day..."

"NO!" Edward yelled holding his head in his flesh hand, seeing as the other had been brutally removed from his body, along with his automail leg. "IT WASN'T MUSTANG! IT WAS... Someone who... looked just like him... ENVY! IT WAS ENVY, The homunculus!" **(2)**

After a moment of digesting Edward's words, Roy felt anger coursing through his veins. But that anger was not directed towards the monster who had raped his subordinate. Roy felt his anger becoming rage. How dare he._ How dare he. _How dare that little brat accuse him of doing something so despicable? That was unacceptable. Roy would not let that go ignored._  
_

He spoke his mind. "How dare you?"

His subordinates and the injured blonde stared incredulously. What was Roy talking about?

"You little brat." Roy spoke, his gloved hands trembling in fury. "How dare you, accuse _me_ of doing that to you."

Riza tried to step in, before things got out of hand. "Sir- he didn't-"

But Roy would here none of it. "This repulsive creature over here-" he said pointing to the wide-eyed Edward "Is a disgrace. A worthless piece of _shit."_

Tears were forming in the golden eyes of Edward Elric. "W-what?" Edward whispered, confused by the sudden personality change of his colonel.

"You-" Roy once again pointed at Edward "Are. A. Liar." He enunciated each word.

"N-no I'm not..."

"A liar. Why can't you stop lying, Fullmetal? Hawkeye was my witness. I was at headquarters. All day."

"B-but I know... it wasn't you it was En-"

"You asked for it, didn't you?" Roy asked but really, it was more of a statement.

"Asked for what?" Edward's face changed from hurt to confusion.

"You are a attention seeking whore. You asked for this. You wanted our concern, our worry. You wanted our pity."

Golden eyes widened in horror. "No! Never... I would never ask for something like this."

"He's telling the truth, sir. Edward doesn't want our pity."

The colonel looked at Edward, calculating him.

"Doesn't matter. I would never have sex, or rape someone like him. He's worthless. Disgusting. A sinner."

He paused before smirking and saying "A dirty orphan."

The tears Edward had been holding back came out in rushes. He buried his head in his remaining hand.

"SIR! GET OUT OF HERE! NOW!" Riza yelled, thoroughly angry with her colonel. She pointed her trusty gun at him, and he walked calmly out of the room.

As soon as the raven haired man was out of Edward's hospital room, the group of subordinates looked at the crying, broken teen.

"I'm so sorry Edward. I'm so, so sorry." Riza whispered.

Jean rubbed his hand on the back of his head. "I'm sorry too, chief. I don't know what came over the boss... he was being a real bastard though..."

Heymans nodded in agreement. "A real bastard."

The sobbing did not cease, no matter how many times the group aplologized. Edward was wondering why he could not forget those words Roy had said to him. They were cold and cruel and it hurt Edward to think about them. He never asked for this, he never would have. He had enough pain in his life, why would he ask for more?

He lifted his face away from his hand, only a little. He stared at them, but his mind was in a different place. Was that _really_ Envy in the alley? What if it really was the colonel? That might explain why he got so angry about it... Edward knew that even with his own temper, if someone accused them of raping them, he would get angry. But... Edward had never said it was Roy. He had said it was Envy... The blonde couldn't understand why... why would Roy say those things to him?

Was he really worthless? An attention seeking whore? A sinner? A dirty orphan? He knew he was a sinner. And yes, he was an orphan... but he wasn't dirty. He wasn't useless. He had helped a bunch of people on a daily basis. Then he thought about Lior. He had thought for all this time he had saved the city, but it turned out... he had caused a riot.

Maybe he really was worthless... but he couldn't be... he wasn't worthless, he had to get Alphonse's body back. Wait... speaking of Al... where was he?

Looking up from his hand, he looked at his group of friends. "Where's my brother?"

The group of five thought for a moment, and Kain answered first. "He went to your dorm after we found you, to get some clothes for you."

"Why would I need-" He stopped his question. He knew the answer. It's because the clothes he was wearing had been ripped by Envy. Or Roy. He couldn't remember. Or he didn't want to remember...

He was trying. He wanted to know. Had the Roy who treated him so cruelly, had it been the fake Roy, or the real Roy? His thoughts were interupted when the hospital door whammed into the wall behind it, showing a suit of armor.

"BROTHER!" Alphonse yelled.

"A-Alphonse..." Came the reply from the broken blonde.

His younger brother came running to his side, clanking across the room. "I was so worried! I thought you would never wake up! I-it's my fault... If I had gone with you..." The armor shook with invisible sobs.

The elder Elric brother was quick to protest. "No, Al it wasn't your fault... it was mine. I was careless. I let my guard down..." Edward lowered his golden head. "I could have defended myself somehow..."

Alphonse was quick to retaliate "Brother! There was no way you knew that would happen, so don't you dare blame yourself!"

"That's right, Edward. This isn't your fault." Riza agreed, as did the others.

"No, it is. It's my fault."

Riza frowned and glared in his direction. "There was nothing you could have done to stop this. From what I understand, homunculi are very strong, especially the one called Envy."

Edward sighed and forced his lifeless, dull eyes to meet Riza's alive, sharp brown ones. "He is strong... but... I could have-"

"No, Edward, you couldn't have, so drop it... please..." Riza said in a soft, motherly tone that no soldier would have guessed she was capable of speaking in.

The teen nodded before lowering his head once more, to stare at his white bed sheet.

"Thank you."

There was a comfortable silence that blanketed the room, and no one was bothered by it. They were each lost in there own thoughts, mostly about Edward and Roy's sudden mood swing and hurtful words. Each continued to stay in that silence until they heard a rather loud.

"NO I REFUSE!" Coming from the hallway. They knew that voice. It was the voice of colonel Roy Mustang, Flame Alchemist. But... just what was he refusing to do?

Their question got an answer with Roy's next angry shout. "I WILL NOT HAVE HIM INTRUDING MY HOUSEHOLD!"

Eyes of various colors, from sharp brown to lazy blue to a eerie, glowing red, shifted to meet Edward's currently fireless golden ones. Each person in the room knew their colonel was talking about Edward staying at his house. Doctors orders.

The group of subordinates found themselves leaning closer to the closed door, straining to hear the doctors reply. "Colonel Mustang, I realize it is an inconvenience, but please, the poor boy needs to be cared for, and you are the only one currently living outside of the military dorms..."

"Then send him to Risembool!" Roy protested. "I don't want him!"

Edward couldn't help but be hurt by the older mans words.

Judging by the tone of the doctors voice, it was clear the man was losing his patience. "I'm sorry sir! But needs to stay _in_ _Central!_ We need to give him check-ups often, and we can't have him a three-day trip away!"

But Roy would not give up. "I don't want him! Force him upon someone else!"

"Sir, I am the doctor, and it is my orders that _you, _Colonel Roy Mustang, be the one to care for him for the time being."

Roy's tone was angrier than the last time he had spoken. "Fine! But if the idiot ends up dead by the end of the week, it's not my fault."

Edward stopped listening. He couldn't take the hurtful words spoken by his colonel. He wanted to be held and comforted, he wanted to feel safe and secure... protected... loved...

_Loved._ Edward wanted to be loved... but by who?

He didn't know. He didn't know who he wanted to be loved by. Surely not Roy...

...Yes, surely not.

Surely, there was no way, that the one person in the world he desired to love him... was his colonel.

...Yes, surely not.

Surely not the man who was fourteen years older than him, his superior officer, of the same gender.

...Yes, surely not.

Surely not the man who had hurt him deeply with his cold spoken, heartless words.

...Yes, surely not.

Surely not the man who had always been a bastard to him, now more than ever.

...Yes, surely not.

Surely not the man who's house he was going to be living in, until he healed.

...Yes, surely not.

_TO BE CONTINUED_

_**Review! Hope you enjoyed!**  
_

**(1) Yes, I know I never showed Envy telling Edward to call him Master. But it happened. I just didn't show it.**

**(2) The group already know about the homunculi.**


	5. Get Through This

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**Dedicated to: My darling metaphorical mother, Payton-chan! Love you!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA!**

**Chapter Five:**

_Get Through This_

Roy sighed after talking to the doctor. He had to admit, he could be an actor with the performance he just put on. He knew that Edward would be listening behind the hospital room door.

The colonel was hurt. When he pointed to him and called him master. When Edward had said he was in the alley with him. Roy had let his emotions take control of him when he shouldn't have.

After he had left the room, he realized what Edward had said. It had been Envy in the alley. Envy, the homunculus. Envy the_ shape shifting_ homunculus.

It's too bad he didn't piece it all together when he had the chance. It was too late now, he had already said those terrible things to Edward. It was clear to him now.

Edward had probably been walking down the alley when he saw Envy, in his form. So when Envy had started talking to him, Edward assumed it was Roy and then got raped. That's why the blonde had screamed when he saw Roy.

Roy pinched the bridge of his nose with his gloved hand. He was so cruel to the poor teen. He had yelled at him like that, after Envy had raped him, while looking like Roy.

So when Roy left the room and pieced that information together, he talked to the doctor, and the doctor had suggested that Roy allow Edward to stay at his house he flipped out. Not because he didn't want Edward there, it was because he didn't know if the blonde alchemist could handle that.

Getting raped by a Roy look alike and then staying in the same house as the real one.

Honestly, right now, Roy felt like curling up into a ball and crying. It must hurt Edward so much to see his face, and living with Roy? That would kill him. Crush his spirits. Edward must be terrified of his face.

Yes, he cared for Edward. More than he probably should. More than what was allowed.

But he couldn't help it. The fiery temper, the determination. Edward's good looks were only a added bonus.

Maybe... Roy loved him... maybe...

So when talking to the doctor, Roy thought he should yell, louder than he would have ever, so that way Edward would be sure to hear him. He said those awful things about not wanting him and 'forcing him upon someone else' so that way Edward wouldn't have to live with him, even if it was only temporary.

And... call it selfish... but, he didn't want to see Edward right now. The usually fiery golden eyes had been turned lifeless and dull. The tan complexion had turned sickly pale. The golden hair was lacked its usually shine.

Edward in general was lackluster. And it pained Roy to see the teen that way.

Imagine the pain he felt, seeing the person he cared for most, be terrified of him because of something that happened, done by someone who looked exactly like him. And Roy never did that to Edward. Never.

Those things he said in that hospital room were a lie. He didn't think Edward was disgusting or worthless. Not a piece of shit. Not a liar. Not a disgrace.

And he knew Edward hadn't lied. He knew Edward didn't want their concern. And especially not their pity.

Roy walked up to Edward's hospital room door. He heard the sound of Edward's dejected sobs. How was he supposed to do this? How was he supposed to live with Edward, when all he could do was make him cry? How could he do this?

He placed his gloved hand on the knob. He didn't believe in God, for he and most alchemists believed that God was nothing more than a construct created by man to inspire fear and promote order. But even though he didn't believe in God, the Sun God Lito, Ishvala or anything like that, he prayed to whatever was up there, watching over him and his cursed existence, that he could get through this in one piece.

That he could get through this without making Edward cry.

That he could get through this without Edward being petrified of him.

He could get through this.

He hoped.

He twisted the metal door knob in his hand, and pushed the wooden door open. His heart broke with what he saw.

Edward was crying, his face in his flesh hand.

Edward was crying.

Edward was crying. _Because of him._

And it broke his heart.

"Edward?" Roy called out softly.

The blonde in question quickly wiped away the tears streaming down his cheeks, hoping his colonel hadn't seen.

But it was too late for that. Roy had seen.

"W-what do you want?" Edward asked shakily. He didn't care how weak he sounded, he was hurt. Physically and emotionally.

"You're coming home with me. Is that alright?"

Edward replied bitterly. "Oh, you couldn't _force_ me upon someone else?"

Roy couldn't blame him for being bitter. He deserved it. Before Roy could reply to the rhetorical question, Riza cut in.

"We'll leave now." She gestured for the other subordinates and Alphonse to leave before her. Mumbles of 'goodnight Edward' or 'night brother' were spoken. When they left she spoke again. "Goodnight Edward." On her way to the door, she whispered just loud enough for the raven haired man to hear. "Don't be so cruel, sir. You are the person who is wrong."

Roy's reply was soft spoken, almost as if he was talking to himself. "They didn't force me."

The blonde's voice cracked as he spoke, as if he was about to start crying again. "I heard you. Every word. And you know I did. And you're right... If I end up dead, it's not your fault. It'll be mine..."

Obsidian eyes opened wide. "What are you saying, Fullmetal?"

"I'm saying that I won't die by your hand. I will die by my own."

As Roy digested this information, Edward spoke again.

"Leave. Visiting hours are over." There was a pause. "But it's not like you want to be here anyway..."

"But I-" Roy protested, but was cut off by the teen lying in the hospital bed.

"L-look colonel, I don't want to hear it right now... So please... please leave..." Edward pleaded.

Roy fulfilled Edward's wish, leaving the room without another word.

Leaving the broken teen to cry alone.

* * *

Morning came early for Edward. He sat alone in his hospital room.

How he wished he wasn't alone.

He felt as if life wasn't worth living anymore. Everything had been taken from him. Everything that mattered. His father, his mother, his brother, his arm and leg, his freedom, his childhood, his home. His innocence.

Edward had one thing left after that. His virginity. And it was forced away from him. Like everything else.

And now he had nothing. Nothing that was his. Nothing that mattered. What life was worth living if you had nothing?

Could he get through this? He was starting to doubt it. His life was hard. No question. Why should he keep living in this hell?

...He didn't have to. He could end it. Finally be at peace. He could rest... everyone would be better off without him...

No one would miss him.

Edward looked around his hospital room. He always hated hospitals... how ironic would it be to kill himself in this place thats supposed to save lives?

Well his life couldn't be saved. No one could save him.

No one wanted to save him.

He glanced around and his lackluster eyes fell upon a gun. Riza's gun. That's right... When Riza came running in last night after he had screamed at seeing Roy, she had placed it down.

And forgot it when she left.

Edward reached out, stretching his injured body. But he grabbed it, barely, but it didn't matter. He had the gun.

The metal was cool in his hand, but it felt like fire. Should he do this? Could he do this?

He could. He could do this. He should do this.

No one needed him. The military would go on without him, and his younger brother was smart. He could get his own body back.

The safety was already off on the silver gun. He lifted it upwards, and pressed it against his temple. His finger was on the trigger. All he had to do was pull his finger back, and he would be dead. Dead. Dead. The word rung through his head.

His finger moved back slowly, but not enough. An image of Roy went through his head. Why couldn't he get the colonel out of his mind? Why was he hesitating before pulling the trigger?

He had hesitated too long. There was a knock on his door. He sloppily shoved the silver gun under his pillow, just as the door opened.

* * *

Roy was walking up the hospital steps. He had woken up early this morning, eager to see his Edward.

..._His_ Edward? Where had he gotten that from? Edward wasn't his...

'_Not yet'. _The little voice in his head whispered.

He walked down the halls, not bothering to stop at the respetionist. They could see his rank in golden stars on his shoulders. Besides, he didn't have time to talk to people this morning. He wanted to see Edward. He needed to see Edward.

As he walked to Edward's room, he got a eerie feeling. Something was wrong. Very wrong. He brought his gloved hand up to knock on the door, when there was no immediate reply, he pushed open the door, just in time to see a very nervous, frazzled Edward.

A Edward that was hiding something.

The morning sunlight poured through the only window in the room, landing on the teens white hospital bed.

But wait... something... under the pillow was glistening in the sunlight... what could it be?

The answer hit him like a ton of bricks. It was a gun. Riza's gun. The gun she had left here last night. And it was loaded.

...So what was it doing under Edward's pillow?

It couldn't be... no... Edward wouldn't...

'_But he would. End the pain. End this suffering.' _That ever so helpful voice in the back of his head whispered once more.

Roy walked briskly to Edward's bedside and ignored his protests as he stuck his hand under the pillow and retrieved the weapon.

"WHAT IS THIS!?" Roy shouted in Edward's face.

"Its u-uh its n-nothing at all..." Came the stuttered reply.

"WHAT WERE YOU GOING TO DO WITH THIS?!" Roy shouted once more.

He wasn't shouting because he was mad... well he was mad, but not at Edward. He was mad at himself. Mad that he couldn't be there to ease Edward's pain... in fact... he had only contributed to make it worse.

Roy slammed the gun on Edward's bedside table.

"I-It's nothing..." Tears had pricked the lifeless golden eyes.

Roy forced himself to not yell again. He didn't want to make the pain worse. "Were you planning to kill yourself with this?"

Edward hesitated "...N-no... why would I d-do that?"

"I don't know, why don't you tell me?"

There was no reply. Just crystal tears that forced themselves out of the blondes eyes.

The raven haired man sighed. "You're coming home with me today. I'll go check you out of here." He paused, thinking for a bit.

_'When I leave this room, will Edward pull the trigger on himself?'_

He looked at the sobbing teen.

_'Better not take the chance.'_

He silently grabbed the gun from the table. Edward immediately protested. "Why are you taking it with you you?"

"Well, you don't need it right? So I might as well."

Edward looked like he had just gotten slapped in the face. "B-but I-I need it..."

"And why is that?"

There was a stretch of silence. Roy walked away from the bed, and to the door, the silver gun clutched tightly in his gloved hand.

"I don't need it. Theres always another way." Edward whispered.

Roy had not wanted to here that. He had wanted to hear that Edward didn't need it because he didn't want to die.

As he walked out the door he wondered...

_'How will we ever get through this?'_

_TO BE CONTINUED!_

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**Hope you enjoyed!**


	6. Maybe Something Good

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**A/N I have a had a very stressful day, so even if this chapter sucks, just be glad I'm writing at all... **

**Dedicated to: Payton-chan as always! Thank you for helping me with all my "imaginary problems" I'm going through.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA!**

**Chapter Six:**

_Maybe Something Good_

Roy was talking to the doctor, apparently, Edward was to leave with him today. At first, Roy was like 'what the hell? It's only been one day since the kid was raped!' but the doctor explained that Edward was giving every nurse and doctor a hard time, and wouldn't let them treat him, even though Edward complained about the pain he was in. So the staff of the hospital thought it would be better to have him treated by someone he knew and trusted.

The colonel had immediately wanted to protest, because from last night, both with Envy and the real him, all trust between them had been destroyed. But after all, Roy couldn't very well say that Edward couldn't leave because a homunculus shape shifted into him and raped Edward, and then the real him got angry and yelled at the injured teen.

They would all think he was crazy.

So, he went along with it.

After Roy checked Edward out of the hospital, he went back to go get him. After walking in the room, he noticed the teen was in a daze, staring off into space.

Roy grabbed Edward's shoulder, in an attempt to shake him, in order to wake the blonde out of the day dream he was in. As soon as Roy's hand made contact with Edward's flesh shoulder, golden eyes snapped to where their skin touched, and he looked at who was touching him.

Upon seeing it was Roy, Edward let out a scream. "DON'T HURT ME! I'll be a good pet, a very good pet, I'll listen. I'll obey, I PROMISE! PLEASE, DON'T PUNISH ME AGAIN!"

Roy dropped his hand from the petrified teens shoulder. "FULLMETAL! STOP! I WON'T HURT YOU!"

The tears that had started to stream down Edward's cheeks during this event coursed down harder after hearing Roy yell at him.

"I'M SORRY MASTER! PLEASE, PLEASE DON'T"

Roy forced himself to calm. Deep breath. He couldn't yell at Edward, seeing as what happened as a reaction.

"...Look Fullmetal, it's okay. I won't hurt you. No one will hurt you ever again."

Edward's sobs started to subside. "P-promise?"

The raven haired man nodded. "I promise."

"Not even you?"

Roy's obsidian eyes widened in shock. _'Why would Edward think I would hurt hi- oh. Right...'._

The tone used was somber. "I would never hurt you, never. I promise."

The crystal tears that had been cascading down Edward's deathly pale face stopped completely. "F-fine."

"Let's go."

A confused look twisted the short blonde's face. "Go where?"

"To my house, Fullmetal."

Edward immediately protested "I'm not going anywhere with you! Besides... it hurts..."

Roy sighed. "I know it hurts, but you can bare through this until we get home, can't you?"

"I guess..."

A mental smirk popped into Roy's mind when Edward did not deny when Roy called his house 'home' instead of 'my house' besides, who knew, maybe one day, it really would be their house and not just Roy's...

Roy would like that.

A lot.

Maybe something good can come from this after all.

He held out his hand for Edward to grab, for the teen was sitting in a hospital bed, with only one arm and leg. Edward accepted the offered hand, but flinched when their skin made contact.

A pretty nurse walked in the door "Here sir, your wheelchair." She said politely, pushing the mentioned object closer to the bed.

"Thank you." Was all Roy said in return. He didn't bother with his flirtatious glance, dazzling smile or any of those techniques. He was near Edward. And the teen was far more beautiful than any woman.

_'I shouldn't be thinking like that, even if it is true... Fullmetal can't even look at me without wincing, let alone love me...' _

As he helped Edward into his wheelchair, that Edward glared at when he saw, the little voice whispered in Roy's head.

_'Give it time.'_

And Roy decided to listen to the voice. He would wait. He would wait until Edward no longer associated his face with that awful night in the alley. Wait until Edward's fresh scars were healed.

And he would help them heal.

"Come on, colonel. Let's go."

Roy nodded, even though he knew Edward couldn't see him from his spot behind his wheelchair. He pushed the wheelchair that contained the Fullmetal Alchemist out of the door.

They went down the hospital corridor and turned left. They were at the hospital entrance, Roy pushed Edward through the door and they made it to Roy's car. Roy debated what to do. Edward couldn't get in the car by himself so how did they get him inside?

He silently decided to just pick up the teen and place him in the passenger seat. All was fine until Roy's hands made actual contact against the fabric of Edward's clothes.

"STOP! STOP! LET ME GO!" Edward thrashed around, squirming and kicking with his flesh leg. "DON'T DO IT! PLEASE!" The panicked blonde shrieked.

Roy felt his fiery temper rising, and tried to douse it down. Getting angry wouldn't help anything, it would make everything worse. But it was hard, having Edward yell his pleads to stop.

"It's okay Edward. It's okay." Roy placed the teen in the passenger seat.

The colonel placed the wheelchair in the back seat and walked around the car and sat in the drivers seat. Twisting the key in the ignition, the engine hummed to life. He stepped on the gas pedal careful not to crash into anything.

The drive to his house was silent. Roy had abandoned trying to strike a conversation. The questions or topics he tried to discussed were answered with a 'humph' or a muttered 'whatever'.

Pulling into the driveway, Roy got out and walked around to Edward's side of the car. Taking out the wheelchair, he opened Edward's door and warned the boy he was about to touch him before picking him up and placing him into the seat of the wheelchair.

Roy's house was nice. It wasn't huge, and it wasn't grand. But it was nice. A simple house. **(A/N you can imagine the house anyway you want to, I don't care.) **There was a small garden in the front yard.

The Flame Alchemist noted that it was very cloudy out, unlike how sunny it had been just moments ago.

Pushing Edward's wheelchair to the door, he took out the silver key and twisted it in the lock. Pushing the wooden door open, he managed to hold the door open and get Edward inside.

"Well this is it, welcome to my humble abode." Roy said as he took off his black coat and military issued boots.

As Roy pushed the wheelchair forward into his home he heard Edward ask "When can I get my automail back?"

The colonel complied to answer. "When you're strong enough, your body can't handle that right now. For now, you need to sleep."

The raven haired man picked the blonde up, bridal style, causing Edward to blush furiously. "What are you doing!?" Edward yelled in embarrassment, not fear.

Roy smirked. "Taking you to bed."

"What?! You perverted old man you better not think I'm going to sleep with you!"

The smirk grew. "Oh my, and you call me perverted? I'm taking you to the guest bedroom... unless you want to go in my bed..." Roy added slyly.

A scream echoed in Roy's ear. "PUT ME DOWN! DON'T DO THIS! PLEASE MASTER!"

Apparently, it was too soon for sex jokes... Roy shushed Edward soothingly. "I'm not your master. Relax, Edward, I was joking."

There was a pause. "You called me Edward."

"That is your name, isn't it?"

Roy looked down and saw the blonde head nodded. "Yeah, but you always call me 'Fullmetal'."

"Well this is my home. I'll call you 'Edward' and you will call me 'Roy'."

At the sight of a protest from Edward's part Roy spoke quickly "That's an order."

Roy climbed the stairs, tightening his grip on Edward. "...Roy..." Edward whispered softly.

The sound of Edward saying his name sent a shiver up his spine. His heart was pounding... and all because he had said his name...

"...Edward..." Roy whispered back.

The blonde's mouth stretched wide in a yawn. "Thank you. I know you'll keep... your... promise..."

And then he was asleep.

Roy walked to the guest bedroom and pushed the door open with his foot. He strode over to the queen size bed in the middle of the room with a red comforter (He had it prepared for Edward... just in case...)

He lifted the overs and placed the sleeping boy underneath. After making sure that Edward was securely tucked in, he pulled back to admire his work. Obsidian eyes lingered on Edward's face. While he was awake, Edward looked so pained, and fierce... but when he was sleeping, all that melted away and the teen looked so peaceful so... at ease. Like nothing had ever gone wrong.

Too bad that wasn't true.

Edward's life had been full of pain, at it still was. All Roy could do was attempt to ease some of his burden. If only Edward would let him. Roy backed away from the bed slowly, not quite wanting to leave the sleeping blonde.

Maybe something good can come from this after all.

Walking away and down the stairs, Roy wondered why this whole situation was getting him so angry. His usually cool temper was rising higher than normal. Was it because he was being accused of something so horrible by someone he deeply cared for? Was it because he didn't have anyone else to take his anger out on besides Fullmetal?

The colonel wanted to know what it was that was causing him to lose his temper faster than ever and say those awful, cruel and hurtful things to his Edward.

As he walked downstairs, a thunderstorm had just started.

* * *

Roy was just finishing his paperwork Riza had dropped off at his house when he heard a scream. Assuming the worst, he stood up quickly, causing the wooden chair to crash to the ground. He ran away from the desk with papers now scattered everywhere and bolted up the stairs.

That was Edward's scream. His Edward was screaming. Why? What was happening? Who was making his Edward scream?

Racing down the hall to Edward's temporary bedroom door, he shoved the door down.

The sight that greeted him was not what he expected.

There was no intruder. There was no blood. There was nothing but a still sleeping Edward thrashing in his new bed.

"Pl- pleas... sto-... col-... colonel... st-op..." The pained voice of Edward whispered. "P-pleas-... I don't... wa-... want... this..."

Roy's heart broke right then. Edward was dreaming about the night in the alley. A nightmare. But it wasn't really Roy that Edward was dreaming about. It was Envy. It really was Envy... why didn't Edward understand?

"Edward! Edward, wake up!" Roy yelled to the sleeping teen.

Roy made the mistake of grabbing Edward's shoulders, to shake him awake. Golden eyes opened wide, fear evident in their depths.

"LET GO!" Edward yelled in desperation.

"DAMMIT, FULLMETAL! LISTEN TO ME!" Roy's temper was rising, and he couldn't stop it.

The blonde struggled against Roy's tight grip. "NO! LET GO! I DON'T WANT IT!"

"SHUT UP! I NEVER SAID I WAS GOING TO DO ANYTHING TO YOU! NOW SHUT THE HELL UP AND LISTEN YOU LITTLE BRAT!"

Edward stopped thrashing. "S-sorry Master... are you going to give me my punishment now?"

"DAMMIT! STOP THAT!"

A confused look was playing on Edward's face. "I-I'm sorry but... stop what, Master?"

"EVERYTHING! JUST QUIT IT OR GET OUT!"

Edward pushed away from Roy with his one hand and stood up on his one leg. "I understand, Roy." He started hopped towards the door.

"Where are you going?" The colonel asked.

The blonde never looked back and continued hobbling out of the bedroom door. "Obeying orders, like a good pet, right colonel?"

By the time Roy realized what that meant Edward was not in the house. A lot of paperwork will cause a man to think slow after a while...Roy looked outside the window, he couldn't see Edward, but that didn't mean anything.

"Dammit, its still thundering... and Edward's alone... with two limbs... ah, hell!" Roy muttered to himself as he ran down the stairs, desperately looking for the short alchemist.

The front door to Roy's house was already open, signifying that Edward had left the house. The colonel grabbed his long black coat and shoved on military boots. He didn't even think about rummaging around for his umbrella, Edward was far more important.

His attraction to Edward outweighed his hatred for rain. He bolted out from the door, almost sliding across the sidewalk. Which way had Edward gone? There was no way to tell... unless...

Roy stooped down low to ground, examining the single mud puddle. A single footstep. Edward had gone that direction. Without waiting another moment, Roy straightened himself off and set off towards the right side of the sidewalk.

There. He saw it. A blur of golden hair. He raced forward and reached Edward, who was struggling to hobble in the wet street. Roy reached out with both arms and wrapped them around the teens waist, pulling him into a hug with Edward's wet back pressed against Roy's muscular chest.

"What?! LET GO!" Edward squirmed out of Roy's loose grip and turned to face his assaulter, who happened to be Roy. "Mustang? What are you doi-" But was cut off when Roy once more pulled him into a bridal style hold.

"We're going home."

Edward protested. "But you said to get out..."

"I didn't mean it. Now come on, let's go home and make you some stew. You'll probably get sick from this..."

The blonde stopped struggling against Roy's hold. "...Fine..."

The walk was silent except for the howling wind and the crack of thunder.

Roy broke the silence. "You know, I have every intention to keep that promise I made to you..."

A soft smile graced Edward's lips. "Yes I know... I'm sorry."

As they walked home. The teen still being cradled in the older mans arms, they both had the same thought.

_'Maybe something good can come from this after all.'_

_TO BE CONTINUED_

**REVIEW!**

**Hope you enjoyed...**


	7. Cross That Bridge

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**A/N I am in a totally SADISTIC MOOD! So this chapter... Probably not the most cheerful thing ever... In fact, none of my writing today has been cheerful... Leave It All Behind wasn't... Neither was What You've Gone Through... An Unnecessary Lie wasn't cheerful... And well, As It Should Be was so not cheerful... Well, the more sadistic the better, right? I'm sure you agree with me, Payton-chan.**

**Dedicated to: Payton-chan! Otherwise known as ! Check out her story, Scarred! I love it! **

**This chapter is 3,000 words, as I promised Payton-chan!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA!**

**Chapter Seven:**

_Cross That Bridge_

Edward had gotten his automail back, and yes, it was painful for the teen, but necessary none the less. He needed to be able to walk on his own. Winry had fussed over him constantly, but it was clear that Ed was used to that treatment from his childhood friend and mechanic.

Roy had gotten to witness the painful procedure of automail attachment. But seeing Ed just simply clench his teeth in familiar pain, when grown men screamed, it made him wonder just how strong the blonde really was.

And it made the colonel admire him for his strength.

Just a little bit.

* * *

It had been four days since that day in the rain. Edward was slowly, ever so slowly getting better. He had more trust in Roy now. Yes, he did still flinch and scream when Roy touched him at all, but he was getting better at not reacting like that.

Edward hadn't tried to kill himself again since that day at the hospital. He hadn't tried to run away either.

_'Everything is slowly becoming better! Maybe... Life can go back to normal soon.'_ Edward thought with hope. It was such a shame that as soon as Edward thought things were getting better, things took a turn for the worst.

* * *

It had been a hard day for Roy. He had been swamped with paperworks and meetings with the Fuhrer and Generals alike. He had overdue paperwork that was of dire importance.

His hand was cramped from signing all those papers with his signature of 'Lieutenant Colonel Roy Mustang, Flame Alchemist', and stamping so many damn papers with his special seal of approval.

His team of subordinates, excluding Riza, had been complaining all day long about the rain, or the girlfriend that just dumped them or how they just finished their last cigarette or sandwich... Complain. Complain. Complain. That's all those men did today.

And it was raining. God, Roy hated rain. Always put him in a pissy mood.

So, what does a twenty-nine year old man do when he's in a pissy mood? Drink. Some nice, strong alcohol.

As soon as he got back to his house, he went straight to the alcohol cabinet, completely forgetting that there was a still terrified-of-him teenage boy by the name of Edward Elric sleeping in his guest room.

Roy took out the strongest alcohol he had and poured a nice, tall glass of it, and downed it. He then repeated that process a few times. The colonel was practically dead drunk by the time he heard the mismatched footsteps on the wooden stairs, signaling the arrival of someone coming down the stairs.

The raven haired man turned his head towards the threshold of the kitchen, where a blonde teenager was standing. Ah, that's right, Roy remembered now. Fullmetal was currently living with him.

And Fullmetal had no idea the man he currently feared was drunk.

* * *

As Edward made his way down the stairs, he heard a noise in the kitchen. Figuring it was Roy, who must have come home when he was sleeping, the short alchemist made his way over to the man holding a glass of amber liquid, sitting at the kitchen counter.

The blonde walked calmly over to the older man. "Hello... Roy... When did you come home?" He asked cautiously, still being somewhat afraid of the man.

Roy's fuzzy mind did not register the question. Instead of answering, he reached out and grabbed the teens shoulder roughly, causing Edward to emit a squeak of panic and terror.

Edward reacted automatically. "I'M SORRY MASTER! PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!" He pleaded in fear.

"Shut up." Those two little words that came from Roy's lips were cold, dripping in venom.

Golden eyes widened in horror. Roy had never said anything to him like that before, not like that. Never. He had promised he wouldn't hurt Edward, right? "I-I'm sorry Master..." Edward muttered apologetically.

"I said shut up. I don't want to hear your horrid little voice." Roy said as he narrowed his obsidian eyes into a glare. "I don't even want you here. The least you could do was keep your disgusting self out of my sights." The colonel was drunk, but did not have a slurred voice. His voice was clear and cold. Menacing and threatening. Dangerous.

Edward knew it. He knew it. He knew he was disgusting. He knew he was horrid. He should've known better than to think that someone as _perfect_ as Roy would ever want to be in the same room as someone as _repulsive_ as he was. Tears welled in his golden eyes.

The blonde tried to free himself form the raven haired man's strong grip. But to no avail.

"Fullmetal? You remember that day at the hospital when you tried to shoot yourself?"

Edward nodded, not trusting his voice to hide his terror.

"You know how I took the gun from you, and stopped you from killing yourself?"

The golden head nodded in acknowledgment.

"I don't know why I stopped you." Golden eyes filled with terror and hurt met obsidian eyes full of anger and malice. The drunk colonel continued. "No one would care if you died. No one. In fact, why aren't you dead right now? Why haven't you dropped dead yet?"

Edward didn't know how to answer. He was close enough to Roy's face to smell the alcohol on the older man's breath. He now knew Mustang had been drinking. A lot. But that did not stop the words from hurting him, and breaking his fragile heart. They say that when you're drunk, you're at your most honest. Was this how Roy truly felt about him?

Roy continued. "I wasn't kidding. No one wants you here. No one wants you alive. You're tarnished. Used. _Dirty._" Roy spat at him. The dam of tears Edward had been holding back came over-flowing, cascading down his tan cheeks. "You're nothing but a burden to me, and everyone else." Roy added.

"Leave." The colonel said, his voice full of anger. "I said leave. I don't want to spend another _second_ with someone pathetic and filthy like you." Roy dropped his hand from the teens shoulders.

Edward ran upstairs. He understood now. He was pathetic. He was filthy. He was tarnished and used. He was a burden. A burden that everyone wanted dead. The blonde got an epiphany. All those things that he had thought were wrong, that wasn't what the bad thing about him was... It wasn't that he was dirty or pathetic... In fact the only thing wrong with him was...

The fact that he was still alive.

But he could fix that.

* * *

Roy's head was pounding. He could barely remember anything that happened in the last four hours. He sat there at the kitchen counter, struggling to remember what his brain, now thinking straight, said it was important to know.

The colonel sighed. What could be so damn important? He lifted his glass and stood up, about to wash it. Halfway to the sink, obsidian eyes widened, and the glass in the pale, ungloved hands dropped and fell to the marble floor, shattering into millions of pieces.

Shattering like a certain blonde's heart.

He remembered. Roy remembered everything. All the things he said to Edward came racing back to his memory.

Damn. He should burn himself now.

How could he? _How could he_ do that to Edward? Terrified, little Edward. There was one thing for that event that stood out more than most. It was when he had been talking abut Edward's attempted suicide, and how he then went on to call him a pathetic burden...

Oh. My. God.

Edward. Was he still alive? Roy bolted up the stairway and down the hall to Edward's room, the door was closed. He grabbed the doorknob and turned. Locked. Alchemically locked. The raven haired man did not hesitate before pulling his gloves out of his pockets, seeing as he always carried one or two pairs, and expertly placed them on in a matter of seconds. As soon as the ignition gloves were on, he snapped, burning the guest room door down with a snap and a crack.

Roy rushed inside of the room. The room was cold, so Roy looked towards the window. It was open, the black curtains blowing in the wind. There was a not, written in the same sloppy, scrawled handwriting he had been reading in reports for years.

_'Colonel,_

_I'm sorry for all the problems I caused you. I never meant to be a burden, to you or anyone else. I know I'm tarnished, filthy and pathetic, I know that. And I also know that no one, including myself, wants me alive. I've caused you and everyone else so many problems. _

_I deserve what I'm getting. And to be honest, I don't know why you stopped me that day at the hospital either. _

_Everyone wishes you didn't._

_From, _

_Major Edward Elric, Fullmetal Alchemist.'_

Oh. My. God. He had to find Edward now! Before Ed makes the mistake of his life- or mistake of his death.

Roy had to stop him. It was his job, his duty. He needed to do this.

...No it wasn't his job or duty to save Edward... He was doing this... Because he wanted to...

Because he cared.

* * *

Edward was walking down the streets. It was thundering, and he was soaked to the bone, but he didn't care. Roy said he wanted Edward gone, so he left. In the alley, he had learned to always follow your masters orders. Roy was his master, so he would take the orders given, and fulfill them to the best of his ability.

He would always listen to his master. When you didn't listen to master, you got hurt.

Punished.

Edward had been punished, and now he was sure that no one would ever want him. Roy would never want him. He wasn't quite sure about why he cared if that _bastard_ wanted him or not.

But he knows that he did care.

He was slowly strolling down the sidewalk. Roy would not come after him. He knew that the man was drunk, and even if he was sober, he wouldn't care. No one cared.

Thunder cracked behind him, but he payed it no heed and continued to walk farther away from his superior officer's house. He made it to an abandoned warehouse. It looked like a place no one ever go in a million years. This would do nicely.

Yes, it would be perfect.

Roy would never find him if he was here. Never. And if by some miracle, and the colonel did find him, it would be too late.

He would already be dead.

* * *

Roy was drenched. He had been out for less than nine minutes, and he was already completely wet. Well, that made his gloves useless. Thunder sounded near him, and the colonel tried not to flinch.

_'Edward is out here in this storm, you can be too.' _Yes, he had served in the Ishvalen War of Extermination, this little storm was nothing.

It was nothing. He saw the prints of Edward's favorite boots in the mud. Roy followed them desperately. The colonel turned down street after street, getting hopelessly lost, but closer to finding Ed.

And he would find him, no matter what it took. And no matter how long it took.

But he what Edward was going to do. He knew the blonde he cared for so much was going to try to end his life.

He needed to stop that.

Roy knew that he was going to have to look high and low for the blonde was certainly not an easy person to find.

But Roy could do it. He could find Ed, and save him in the process.

* * *

Ed had just finished climbing the old warehouse. Standing on the roof, in the rain, it was very dramatic. Maybe the rain could take his sins away.

Well, if it couldn't take his sins, at least it could was away his blood, when he jumped off the roof to his demise.

If Roy didn't want him, then nobody ever would. Roy had seen him at all of his lowest points in life. Right after the transmutation, right after Nina's death. All those points in his life, Roy had seen him.

It was only right that the colonel could see Ed in death too. And at his grave, where he really was at the lowest point, because he'd be six feet under the ground, in a casket.

He stood on the edge of the roof, tilting his golden head back, savoring the feeling of the cold rain on his cheeks. It would be the last thing he ever felt, and he wanted to remember it always, even in death.

There would be no more of Roy's hands braiding his hair in the morning, as he had done when Ed had only one arm. There would be no more steel wrenches thrown at his head, as his friend so often had done.

There would be nothing.

Nothing but the cold embrace of death.

* * *

Roy had been running when he went by a warehouse. It was old and rundown, and he was about to continue past it, when he saw something that caught his attention.

Something red.

Coming from atop the roof.

A red jacket was billowing in the wind, golden hair damp with rain. Edward was there. Standing on the roof.

It took the colonel a minute to register something.

...Ed was about to jump off.

* * *

Edward looked down, at the wet pavement beneath him. That would be his place of death.

And that was okay with him.

He smiled. He could finally be with his mother again, after all these years.

With his mother and away from Roy.

Ed put his right foot forward, about to step off of the warehouse roof, when wet, muscular arms encircled his waist. Wet, muscular, _familiar_ arms. Roy's arms. Roy pulled him against his chest, away from the roof.

"What are you doing, Edward?" Roy asked in a soft, quiet tone.

Edward answered immediately. "I'm doing you a favor. You said you didn't want to spend another second with me... And no one else would ever want to... So I thought I could fix it..."

"Killing yourself... That isn't how you fix things." Roy chided gently. "And you're right I don't want to spend another second with you..." There was a pause, and Edward stilled in Roy's arms. "I want to spend hours with you. Days."

It was then Roy realized that what he was saying, was true. But... It wasn't just hours and days Roy wanted. The colonel wanted years... He wanted forever.

* * *

Roy had just finished tucking the sleeping blonde in to his bed. Roy smiled at him, knowing the teen couldn't see it.

Maybe... Maybe he loved Edward.

Was that wrong? To love someone almost half your age... The same gender as you... And his subordinate?

Was that wrong? It didn't matter to Roy.

Every time he was around the Fullmetal Alchemist, his heart would race and all he could think of was how soft the teens lips would be, or how it would feel to hold the the blonde in his arms.

Such a sad life Ed had been forced to live. From his yearly years to now. Someone needed to help Edward along the way of his journey. Someone needed to help Edward, care for Edward, love Edward, for the rest of the blonde's life.

And that someone would be Roy.

Now, all he had to do was gain Ed's trust. Then maybe, just maybe, they could be happy together.

Roy knew he would wait for that day.

Roy also knew that he would never be drinking around Edward again. He couldn't risk it. He didn't want to risk it. Ed was far more important than any amount of alcohol, or women.

Women could never give him this feeling, of complete and utter adoration for someone. But yet, the Fullmetal Alchemist had.

Roy smiled and walked back to his own room, so he could sleep in his bed. God, chasing Ed around the city trying to stop him from killing himself sure was tiring...

The raven haired man smiled at the thought of Edward... Dammit, he was really starting to turn into some sappy lovestruck puppy.

If he started writing poetry, he was going to get someone to shoot him... Roy was sure Riza wouldn't mind.

He wrapped himself in his navy colored comforter. Prepared to hit the pillow and fall into a deep slumber. But sleep did not come for a while yet, he was too busy thinking of Ed.

And when he finally did fall asleep, his dreams were of what would have happened... If he hadn't stopped Ed.

Or what would happen if Edward tried to kill himself again... Well, he'd cross that bridge when it came to it.

It's a shame he didn't realize then...

That he would have to cross that bridge much sooner then he ever would have thought.

Yes, much sooner.

And the next time... He just might not be able to stop it.

_TO BE CONTINUED!_

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	8. Couldn't Be Repaired

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**Dedicated to: Payton-chan, love you giiirrrlllll. Check out her story, Scarred, it's amazing! And my 'sexy' friend, Zane!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA!**

**Chapter Eight:**

_Couldn't Be Repaired_

The next morning, Edward did not leave his room, claiming he didn't feel well. Roy had accepted that excuse, seeing as Edward had been standing out in the rain. But as soon as Roy shut the door as he left, Ed dropped his 'sick' act.

Physically, he felt fine.

Emotionally, he felt like he was dying.

Dying... That word brought him back to his memories of yesterday. He had tried, yet Roy had stopped him. Why? Why would Roy do that? _He_ had been the one to say that he didn't want to see Ed anymore. He was the one who said those awful things.

Yet then, he had 'saved' him.

In Roy's eyes, he had saved Edward.

In Edward's eyes, Roy had just damned him to be condemned among the living. And he hated it.

Living wasn't worth it anymore. It wasn't worth the pain, the suffering. The humiliation. The humiliation of everyone constantly asking him if he was 'okay'.

He was never 'okay'.

He couldn't be repaired.

He would always be broken.

And life certainly wasn't worth the pity. People many not come and say it out loud, but Edward can see it shining in their eyes. Life wasn't worth those comments people whispered when he passed, thinking he couldn't hear them. 'Oh, I heard the great Fullmetal Alchemist got "raped"... He really is "an alchemist of the people", isn't he?'

That's what the soldiers in the halls would say. That he asked for it, like some begging whore.

Had he wanted Ro- Envy to break him like that? No. He hadn't. He hadn't wanted any of this for happen.

He hadn't wanted any of this to happen.

He hadn't wanted to get raped.

He hadn't wanted to live with his superior officer.

And he certainly hadn't wanted to fall for Roy.

But all of that had happened.

And there was no stopping it now.

Edward knew he couldn't be repaired.

* * *

It was early morning, and Roy had woken up and was currently making pancakes, made with water, not milk. The colonel had decided to be nice, seeing as Ed had said he didn't feel well, and Roy was worried for his health, decided to make them both a nice breakfast.

The pancakes were sizzling in the pan, begging Roy to flip them over, before they got burned.

But being the pyro he was, he did not remove the pancakes, or flip them to the other side. Not knowing any better, he left them there, burning away. As he poured coffee into two mugs, he heard uneven footsteps clanking on the floor above him.

A groggy Edward walked into the kitchen, rubbing his golden eyes.

"Morning..." Edward yawned.

"Good morning, Ed." Roy replied, finally deciding after smoke was coming from their breakfast to flip the pancakes over.

Another yawn from the blonde's part. "Watcha makin'?"

"Breakfast."

Ed stared at him, shocked. "You can _not_ legally call _those things_ breakfast."

Roy scoffed. "Of course I can, that's what it is." He informed Edward.

"Oh _fuck_ no. We're going to die if we eat that shit."

Obsidian eyes rolled upwards sarcastically. "I eat this every day, and I haven't died yet, Edward."

Edward sighed. "Then it's only a matter of time..." He muttered, accepting his fate and sitting at the dining room table.

Roy glared humorously. "Yes it is, now shut up and eat." The colonel said, harshly placing the plate with the burnt shit- uh, pancakes- in front of Edward.

The blonde poked at the burnt pancakes on his plate with a silver fork. _Poke. Poke. Poke._

_'I don't want to eat... I don't want to do anything, I just want to lie down... And sleep... Forever. It's too late for me. I'm the broken doll that couldn't be repaired.'_

"Stop playing with your food, Fullmetal, and eat it." Roy grumbled, stabbing a piece of pancake on his plate and shoving it into his mouth, as if to prove a point to the younger man.

The eldest Elric brother sighed once more, admitting defeat and grabbing the maple syrup bottle, drowning the pancake in the sugary liquid.

"What are you doing Edward?" Roy said, exasperated that Ed wouldn't just eat the damn thing.

"I'm making it edible." He said as he used his fork cautiously place a piece of pancake in his mouth.

The raven haired man and the blonde teen finished their food in silence after that comment from Edward. It wasn't an awkward silence, but it wasn't exactly comfortable either.

It was more like... They were both just deep in thought.

_'I hope he believes this... This act I'm putting on for him. For him, just for him. He doesn't need to know what I'm planning. He doesn't need to know anything.'_ Edward thought to himself as he stabbed another piece of his breakfast on his fork.

Thinking about his plan made him lose his meager appetite. He pushed the ceramic plate away from him.

"What's wrong?" Roy asked, worry lacing his voice.

Edward tensed. How could Roy tell? How could Roy see through his mask?

"Nothing." Edward replied somberly.

"You're lying." The colonel said accusatorially.

The short blonde tried his best to keep his mask emotionless. "Why do you say that?"

Yes, Ed was lying. He was lying about everything. Lying to himself, lying to Roy.

"Because I can tell. Something isn't right, so tell me." Roy didn't know how he had expected Ed to be the same after last night. But he had. The raven haired man had hoped that everything could go back to how it was before Roy said those things to the blonde. He had hoped.

But now he knew.

Now he knew that it would never go back to normal.

The words had been said.

They could not be taken back.

The damage had been done.

It couldn't be repaired.

Nothing would ever be the same.

It would never go back to normal.

Everything Roy had done, everything he had said...

None of it could be taken back.

And none of it could be repaired.

_TO BE CONTINUED!_

_**Hope you liked it!**_

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	9. All Breaking Apart

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**A/N I really am trying to update as frequently as possible, but I do have other stories to write and my laptop is out of commission for a while. I don't know when I am getting my new one, but I am trying.**

**Dedicated to: Payton-Chan, aka Payton Pride. Love you!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA!**

**Chapter Nine:**

_All Breaking Apart_

Edward made sure to stay away from Roy after breakfast. He couldn't have Roy finding out about his plan...

No. That would ruin everything.

Ed couldn't let Roy find out. But now the blonde knew what he had to do.

He had to execute his plan faster. No lingering. No hesitating. Nothing. Just. Do. It.

The Fullmetal Alchemist couldn't afford to have his colonel 'save' him again.

The teen went through his plan again. Run away... Find somewhere secluded, where Roy might find him, but when Roy found him, it would be _too late._.. And then... This was Edward's favorite part here... Then end his life.

He planned on cutting his wrist, the main vein. So he could admire his beautiful blood as his life slipped away.

But that plan would have to wait.

He couldn't do it now... Roy was just waiting for him to make a move like that. The colonel was too prepared.

But he would do it.

That, he swore to himself.

* * *

Roy had to admit, he was worried. Edward had been avoiding him _all _day long. Not even a 'hello' or a 'hey, bastard'. Nothing.

When Ed saw Roy, he would avert his golden eyes and walk the opposite direction, or go back to his room.

Now, the colonel was positive that Ed was planning something.

Something he wouldn't like.

So, the raven haired man was being extra careful not to upset Edward, or be a bastard to him. Anything that would push the teen over the edge. He was doing his best to make Ed happy.

_'Happy like he deserves to be...'_ Roy thought to himself as he walked into the kitchen.

Roy was planning on making stew for dinner. Stew was Ed's favorite, Al had told him so.

The colonel was coming across some unfamiliar feelings. Roy wanted to be the one who made Ed happy. Roy wanted to be the one who Ed went to when he was hurting. Roy wanted to be the shoulder Ed could cry on. Roy wanted to be the one to hold Edward, and whisper sweet nothings and comforting words.

He wanted to be Edward's. And he wanted Edward to be his.

But why did he want this?

He wasn't falling for Edward... Was he?

No. That... Wasn't possible. Ed was fourteen years his junior, his subordinate. His _male_ subordinate.

This wasn't possible...

The Flame Mustang; Hero of Ishval; Central's womanizer... Was falling for... The Fullmetal Alchemist; Hero of the People. The people's alchemist.

But... Fullmetal's golden blonde hair. Those eyes that sparkled like the fiery sun. Those pink, soft lips. The glistening tan skin. Oh. My. God. Roy really _was_ turning gay for Ed, wasn't he?

But Roy couldn't muster up any emotion that minded.

Whoever said they couldn't be together? Oh, that's right. Society. They would be shunned.

And yet again, Roy couldn't muster up any emotion that minded.

Yes, Roy Mustang was in love with Edward Elric.

The colonel knew he loved Ed, but how did Ed feel about him? Roy wanted to know, desperately so.

* * *

Edward sighed as he dropped his head onto his pillow. Roy had broken his promise. The colonel had promised he wouldn't hurt Ed, but he did. Emotionally. And that always hurt more than any physical wound.

He didn't know what to do.

Should he kill himself? He had no reason not to.

Should he tell Roy that he thinks he loves him? He had every reason not to.

Should he stay here? He didn't know.

Should he trust Roy? He didn't know.

What should he do?

As Edward laid there, he decided something. He would try to trust Roy. He wouldn't jump and scream when the colonel came into contact with him. He wouldn't scream for mercy. He wouldn't plead for 'master' to stop.

Now, he needed to talk to Roy.

* * *

Roy was reclining in his favorite comfortable chair when he heard the uneven footsteps clanking down the stairs. Edward stopped at the bottom of the stairs and looked around, checking for Roy.

Upon spotting the raven haired man, the blonde walked over to the chair Roy was sitting in and stood in front of him.

"I've decided that I will _try_ to trust you." Edward said, getting straight to the point.

Obsidian eyes widened. Was Ed really saying this? After what had happened? After what Roy had said?

"Thank you." Roy said simply, but the tone he used made it genuine.

Edward gave a small smile. "So, how about we do something?"

"Like what?" The colonel asked.

The major thought for a second. "Hmm, I've heard that you are quite good at chess..."

"Yes, I am." Roy said, taking his chance to brag.

The smile on Ed's face turned to a smirk. "Well, it so happens that I am too."

"We'll just have to see who's better." Roy challenged the teen.

Both smirks grew. "Fine, let's do that." Edward agreed.

* * *

The older man had left to go find his chess board, and Ed took this as his chance to take a breath.

He sat next to the fireplace, now lit, seeing as Roy had snapped to bring the flames to light before he left in search of the game.

In all honesty, this was almost a bit too much for him. He had thought it would be simple... Trust Roy, hang out with Roy. Then it would all be fine.

But it wasn't that simple.

Ed's emotions were conflicting. He was in love with this man, but yet... He was also afraid of him.

He knew he shouldn't be afraid. He knew it was Envy in that alley, and not the Flame Alchemist.

But... He was still so terrified. It had been Roy's face he had seen when Envy was pounding mercilessly into him.

He was so afraid.

Edward would try. He would try to overcome this fear.

* * *

Roy had finished looking for the chess set, and was currently walking back to the living room, where Edward was waiting, with the board settled in the crook of his arm.

As he walked back into the living room, he spoke to alert Edward of his arrival. "Hey, Edw-" Roy stopped dead when he saw the glow of the flames from the fireplace lighting up Edward's golden face.

His hair, turned a shade lighter by the light from the flames.

His eyes, with the firelight dancing in the golden orbs.

His skin, glowing by the light of the fire.

He looked beautiful. Roy knew that Ed was _always_ beautiful... But this was a true sight to behold for Roy. It made the colonel wonder what the young alchemist looked like in the moonlight.

Ed turned his head sideways, so he could see the person who had entered.

"Roy, did you find it?" The teen asked.

The man in question released a breath, trying not to concentrate solely on how beautiful Edward was.

"Y-yeah I did." Roy cursed himself silently for sounding so shaky.

Edward smiled, his teeth sparkling in the firelight. Roy took another shaky breath. It was taking all the colonel had not to just jump the blonde now.

And with that thought, they set up their game.

* * *

Hours later, the last round of the game had come to an end.

The first round, Roy had won, and Ed had refused to admit defeat and demanded they play a new round. From there on it went a win for Flame, and then a win for Fullmetal.

Thus, the game ended, far past 'curfew', in a tie.

"Good game, shorty." Roy called mockingly.

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SHORT THEY COULD DROWN IN A RAINDROP!" Ed yelled in the face of his colonel. There was a pause before the teen added "Yeah, you too, bastard."

* * *

Fullmetal and Flame had called it a night and Roy was guiding Ed back to the guestroom. Ed walked into the room that was now his, and laid in bed as Roy tucked him in, simply because he wanted to.

Things had certainly changed between them, and they both knew it. Almost all the fear Edward held for Roy was gone, replaced by something sweeter. Love. Roy's love for Edward had grown immensely, but neither of them knew the feelings the other harbored for each other.

As Roy turned to leave, Ed called out his name.

"What is it, Ed?" Roy asked, curious as to what the teen wanted.

A light layer of pink covered the blonde's cheeks. "Um... Could you get me a glass of water? My throats a little dry..."

Roy smiled. "Sure, it's no problem."

"Thank you."

"Anytime, Edward. Really, anytime." Roy replied.

Both of them knew they weren't talking about the water.

* * *

Edward sighed in happiness as he laid in bed, waiting for the older man to return with his water.

He knew he could trust Roy. The colonel had done nothing wrong. In fact, Roy had done nothing but support and comfort him this entire journey. He trusted Roy.

He loved Roy.

And nothing could change that.

* * *

Roy was making his way down the stairs, about to get the blonde alchemist's glass of water.

He knew he loved Edward.

And nothing could change that.

It didn't matter to him that Edward was fourteen years younger, that he was his subordinate, and a male at that.

None of that mattered.

Roy smiled to himself. Ed was so amazing. And now the Fullmetal Alchemist never had to be afraid of the Flame Alchemist again.

The smile grew.

And just as it did, Roy heard a crash and a scream of a terrified teenager.

The scream of a terrified Edward.

And just when Edward had finally trusted Roy...

...It was all breaking apart.

_TO BE CONTINUED!_

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	10. A Promise He Couldn't Keep

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**A/N *Sigh* I have three stories I need to write, but, you guys said to continue this one now... My laptop is still out of commission. And, since it is my summer vacation, I do have plans... I went to the Port Anime Con. yesterday! I bought over 200 dollars worth of FMA stuff! Anyway, enough of my blabbering...**

**Dedicated to: Payton-Chan, as always!**

***WrightingSadist- I think you will be much more pleased with this chapter then the last, _so sorry_ that my last chapter was "boring".**

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA!**

**Chapter Ten:**

_A Promise He Couldn't Keep_

Roy's brain took a minute to process what had happened. He had heard a crash and a scream... The colonel was trying to find a logical reason, or maybe an excuse, that would make him hear those noises.**  
**

Option one: Roy was tired... Maybe he was hearing things.

But Roy knew that wasn't it. He had stayed up far later than this before, and nothing like this had ever happened.

Option two: Edward had simply fallen out of bed, and knocked over something... Like a lamp.

But there was no lamp next to Edward's bed. And Ed didn't seem like the type of guy to scream because he had fallen out of bed.

That left only one option.

Something was very terribly wrong.

The raven haired man had been standing on the stairs for far longer than he should have been, and as soon as he realized that, he quickly went back up the stairs.

"Edward? Are you alright?" Roy asked as he walked down the hall.

There was no answer, but as Roy drew closer to the guest bedroom he heard muffled cries. The Flame Alchemist put on his ignition gloves and snapped. The door, that Edward had repaired earlier **(1)**, Fell to the floor, burnt to ashes.

The sight that greeted him, made his eyes widen, and his heart shatter.

* * *

Edward had been waiting for Roy, and suddenly, there was Roy, crashing through the window.

"Roy? What are you doi-" Edward was cut off when Roy threw him to the ground, and straddled his waist.

"Have you been a good pet while I was gone?" 'Roy' asked him, his tone filled with malice and sadistic pleasure.

"M-master?" Edward shakily called.

'Roy' gave Ed a smirk full of evil intentions. "That's right my pet... I'm back."

And that was when Edward emitted a scream of terror.

* * *

Roy looked around the room. There was glass all around, the window's glass was broken and jagged on the floor.

And there, on the floor straddling Edward's body, was him.

Roy Mustang watched as the other Roy Mustang stole a harsh and brutal kiss from the struggling Edward.

"Stop!" The blonde pleaded as the other Roy pulled away from his lips. "You promised!"

"I never had any intention of letting you be happy." Envy said as he laughed.

Envy was currently working on getting Ed's pants off. Seeing that made something inside the real Roy snap.

So that's what the colonel did.

A string of flames charged towards Envy, and Envy, realizing that he was in danger, jumped off of the terrified with inhuman agility and grace.

"So, the flame colonel is here after all..." Envy mused to himself.

"Damn right I am. And you will not touch Edward _ever_ _again._ I will _personally _make sure of that." Roy said threateningly.

The homunculus sighed before walking to the broken window. "Well, Fullmetal Pipsqueak... It looks like our fun time has been cut short." Before jumping out of the window, Envy added "But I'll make sure we get that time together... Without the colonel."

And then he was gone.

* * *

Roy slowly approached Edward, not sure of how the teen would react.

"E-Ed?" Roy called shakily.

Roy kneeled down on the floor next to Edward, prepared for the blonde to jump away screaming. Instead, Edward threw himself onto Roy, wrapping both flesh and metal arms around Roy's torso. After getting over his initial shock, the colonel wrapped his own arms around Edward's waist, holding him close.

As Ed started crying, his sobs wracking his small frame, Roy tightened his grip.

"It's okay, Edward." Roy whispered softly. "I'm right here. I'll protect you."

The older man pulled back from the hug a little and kissed Edward's forehead.

"It'll all be okay." Roy's tone was full of love.

"How... do you... know?" Edward asked through his tears.

Roy did not answer, simply wrapped his arms tighter around Ed's waist.

* * *

A while later, Roy noticed that the tears that had soaked his shirt were coming to a stop, and Edward's breathing was becoming even, signaling that the blonde was now falling asleep.

After he was certain that Fullmetal really was asleep, he changed positions and lifted Ed up off the hardwood floor bridal style and looked at the bed that Ed had been sleeping in during his stay.

His obsidian eyes then made contact with the window, and the glass that had not yet been cleaned up.

It wasn't safe to leave Ed in this room...

Envy's last words echoed in his head. _'But I'll make sure we get that time together... Without the colonel.'_

It wasn't safe to leave Ed alone.

Roy cradled the small teen as he left the room, and made his way to his own bedroom.

After struggling to open the door and keep Edward safe in his grip, he walked inside.

The navy comforter on his bed was tidy and neat. The colonel lifted back the sheets and blankets on his king sized bed and placed Ed gently underneath.

After tucking the young alchemist in, Roy made his way to the other side of the bed, where he would be resigning. After making himself comfortable in his bed, he looked over at the 'sleeping beauty'.

Then he remembered how dangerous it was for Ed right now, with Envy prowling around.

He moved closer to Ed. Roy wondered how he could keep the blonde safe. After his thoughts on that topic, he once again wrapped his arms around Ed's waist, bringing the small teen's back to his muscular chest.

The raven haired man brought one hand to Ed's braid, and pulled out the elastic, releasing the golden locks.

He placed his lips upon the sleeping Edward's head.

And the words he spoke before falling into the clutches of sleep fell upon deaf ears.

"I really do love you, Edward... And I promise I will keep you safe."

But, what he didn't know was that the promise he just made...

Was a promise he couldn't keep.

_TO BE CONTINUED_

**Review!**

**(1) A chapter or two ago, when Edward ran away, I wrote that Roy had burnt down the door which had been alchemically locked.**

**Hope you liked it! And I hope it wasn't "boring."**


	11. He Knew That

**Read And Review!**

**Dedicated to: Payton-Chan, as always! Thank you so much, my little butterfly. And my brand new friend: arianamarie valdez! And also for you, MidnightsFantasy! And to all my wonderful reviewers!  
**

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA!**

**Chapter Eleven:**

_He Knew That_

Edward awoke by the feeling of eyes watching him. He kept his eyes close, as to not alert the watcher that he was awake. He could feel the judging eyes scanning his body. It made goosebumps rise to the surface of his skin.**  
**

Those eyes that were feasting on his image had an evil intention.

The blonde was preparing to open his eyes. He wanted to know who was watching him.

However when he opened his golden eyes... There was nothing.

But the feeling of being watched did not leave him.

He closed his eyes once more, and nestled back into the warmth that was wrapped around him, not even noticing it was Roy's arms that he was burrowing himself into.

* * *

The Flame Alchemist woke up by ring of his telephone.

Damn Hawkeye.

He knew it was her calling, saying that he was late and needed to get his ass down to the office now, before she sent a bullet through his head. But Roy didn't want to move.

Not just because he was tired and semi-lazy... But because Edward was there. In his arms.

Sure, Ed was sound asleep and probably not aware that he was even in the colonel's arms, but still. It felt nice just to hold him.

There was a certain... Warmth Edward held. A warmth of determination. Loyalty. In fact, Edward in general held a special light around him. To the colonel, it was like whenever Ed entered a room, he brought a new light with him. Everything became brighter. Happier. Better.

The phone continued to ring. Roy continued to ignore it.

Nothing was more important right now then enjoying having Edward in his arms.

Nothing.

He knew that the first lieutenant would not stop calling until he answered, but he refused to move from his comfortable position and get it himself.

Roy might just call her back, if Ed wakes up, and moves from his arms.

But not until then.

So, Roy sighed and tightened his grip around the blonde teens waist. He never wanted to let Ed go. He knew it was unrealistic, to be able to hold Edward forever...

But a man could dream, couldn't he?

* * *

There was a weight around his waist, and a hard, yet comfortable and warm surface pressed against his back.

Ed wouldn't lie, it felt nice.

He opened his eyes, curious to see what this feeling was. Fullmetal turned his head, and his golden eyes widened and shock as his tan cheeks changed to a hot pink, burning the soft skin.

Roy was asleep, his arm wrapped securely around his waist, like he would never let go. His back was pressed against Roy's impressively muscular chest, which all the women in Central swooned over.

Now he knew why.

He couldn't deny that Roy did indeed have an impressive set of abs. Edward wondered that when Roy was shirtless, did his muscles sparkle in the dazzling sunlight?.

Well, _that_ sounded gay.

He knew he was about as straight as a circle. He came across his sexuality that night when chasing Psiren across the rooftops. He had squeezed her breast, on accident, and yet... Nothing. He didn't get turned on at all.

That, was when he knew he was gay.

And when he thought about Mustang's abs sparkling in the sunlight was when he knew that he had fallen for Roy.

But Roy would never be able to reciprocate those feeling. Ed knew it. He was tarnished and used. _Dirty_.

No one could love him now.

No one wanted someone who was used.

No one wanted a sinner like he was.

No one wanted an orphan.

Edward knew he must be the most unappealing combination out there. He was used, a sinner, and most of all... He was a dirty orphan. Roy had said it himself. No one wanted him.

He was unnecessary. Unwanted. Unclean. **(1)**

Who would want him now?

Envy had ruined what little he had left. He could never gain it back. That which had been taken could never be replaced. But what did he get in exchange? Where was the equivalence of all this?

Ed was prodigy. But still, he could not answer those questions. He didn't know the answer, and he might never be able to answer them. Only time could tell. If he gained something, he didn't know what he could possibly gain that would be equivalent to his virginity.

_'Humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost.'_ The blonde quoted the famous law of alchemist's in his mind. He knew it well, for it was the one law he lived by.

Ed wasn't sure if he wanted to move or not. Having Roy's arm around him was... Comfortable.

He no longer feared Roy. He knew, with one-hundred percent certainty, that it was Envy who had been with him that night in the alley. He had no reason to fear the real Flame Alchemist.

It was foolish to have ever been afraid of Roy in the first place. He knew that now.

The blonde snuggled into Roy. He would die of embarrassment if Roy had been awake to feel him nuzzle into him, but Roy appeared to be asleep, so he allowed himself the luxury of feeling the warmth of being held.

Of being loved.

So, he just lay there in Roy's arms. Thinking about what he was going to do next.

* * *

Roy kept his smirk hidden as he felt Edward snuggle into him. So, Ed didn't mind being held after all?

Well, he was definitely not calling Riza now.

He couldn't help what he did next. He leaned down, next to Ed's ear, whilst still maintaining his grip on Ed and whispered in the blonde's ear. "Good morning Edward."

Said teen immediately tensed. "You mean your awake?" Edward asked, nervous about what Roy was going to say about Edward snuggling with him.

Roy couldn't keep the smirk hidden anymore. "Yes, I am awake."

Edward blushed crimson. He already knew that Roy couldn't love him, so then why was the colonel tolerating this? Why was the colonel still holding him?

"Roy? Why are you holding me?" Ed asked, thoroughly embarrassed of the situation.

A light pink dusted the older man's cheeks._ 'Because I love you.'_ His mind told him to say.

"Because I want to keep you safe." Was what fell out of Roy's mouth. He couldn't tell Ed he loves him. Ed didn't like him like that. In fact, the teen was terrified of him... Wasn't he?

"Edward... Aren't you afraid of me?" Roy asked curiously. Why wasn't Ed screaming and running away?

The blonde gave a soft smile and shook his head. "No. I'm not. There's no reason to be. It was Envy... In that... Alley..." He didn't wait for the colonel to reply before asking "can I use your shower?"

Roy, dumbfounded by both the answer and question, just nodded. "Yeah, sure..."

Ed bolted out of Roy's arms, and raced towards the bathroom, where the shower was.

Leaving Roy to sulk at the lack of Edward in his arms.

* * *

He needed to clean himself.

"I need to clean... I need to be clean. I'm dirty. Filthy." He muttered as he stripped himself of his shirt, exposing his toned stomach and chest.

When he was completely removed of all clothing, Edward turned the water to scalding hot. He didn't care if it burned his automail port or anything. Ed stepped into the shower.

He picked up a scrub brush. Could this really clean him? Of his sins? Of the dirt that lay just behind a layer of skin?

Edward would scrub until he was clean.

He grabbed the brush and dragged it back and forth on his body until the skin was irritated and red. A few more strokes and his tan skin was red with blood.

He was making himself bleed, but he was not yet clean.

"I'm dirty. I need to get clean. Clean. Dirty. Oh so dirty." Edward mumbled to himself as he scrubbed away another layer of skin, the boiling water scalding his back.

He would _never_ truly be clean.

* * *

Roy was getting worried. No scratch that, he _was _worried_._ It had been at _least_ an hour since Fullmetal had declared he needed to use the shower._  
_

"What could be taking so long?" He wondered aloud as he paced back and forth his bedroom floor.

Another ten minutes went by, and Roy's patience ran out.

He walked briskly to the bathroom door. He placed his bare hand on the brass doorknob, praying it wasn't locked.

And to his surprise, it wasn't.

_'What made Edward want to get in the shower so fast... That he hadn't even locked the door?'_ Roy asked himself as he pushed open the door.

Steam coated the entire room. From the windows to the mirrors, condensation fogging it up.

"Edward?" Roy called out for the petite blonde whom he loved.

There was no reply, but Roy strained his ears to hear the soft whispers coming from the shower.

"-Must get clean. I'm dirty. So filthy. I need to get clean." Ed's voice whispered eerily.

Roy, completely forgetting the fact that the teen was naked behind that shower curtain, moved towards it. He raised his pale hand towards the shower curtain.

He swiped the curtain away from the silhouette he saw. Edward didn't notice him. He just continued to mumble about cleaning himself.

The colonel saw blood. Edward was scrubbing himself raw. "Edward! Ed! FULLMETAL, STOP!" Roy yelled in desperation.

Roy reached his hand out to grab the blonde's arm to force him to stop scrubbing. The water burned his hand, but he paid it no heed. Edward was more important then not burning his hand.

Edward was more important then anything.

The Flame Alchemist forgo the idea of just stopping Ed from scrubbing away at himself. He tried not to think about how how the person he loved was naked in front of him as he wrapped his arms around Ed and pulled him to his chest, forcing the teen out of the scorching hot water.

As soon as the cool air hit Ed's skin, he realized something was wrong.

Why could he no longer clean himself?

Golden eyes looked upwards, and saw that Roy's obsidian eyes bore into his own. "Why did you stop me?" Ed asked somberly.

"Because you were hurting yourself." Came the reply from the colonel, his arms not removing from Ed's waist and torso, where they were currently wrapped.

"I need to get clean! Envy made me dirty! I need to be clean!" He said loudly. "You won't love me if I'm not clean..." Edward whispered too softly for Roy to hear.

"Edward, you're injuring yourself!"

"It doesn't matter, as long as I can be clean!" Edward persisted.

The raven haired man sighed. "You shouldn't hurt yourself just to be clean. It's not worth it." He didn't want Ed harming himself, even if it wasn't intentional. "And you aren't dirty."

Edward would rather die clean then live dirty.

"But I'm dirty. No one can love me if I'm dirty." The blonde said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. Edward wanted to be clean. Clean. He was so dirty, so filthy... He needed to be clean.

Because Roy couldn't love him if he wasn't clean.

No one could love him.

He knew that.

_TO BE CONTINUED_

**Review! Hope you enjoyed!**

**(1) For those of you Black Butler fans out there, you will recognize that phrase... I just thought it was fitting for this situation. But no, Angela/Ash is not going to come "snuff him out."**

**Hey, look! It's not even a cliffhanger this time! Bu****t just who is watching Edward? Hmm... I guess you'll never know... Unless you want me to update sooner... If you want me to, tell me. Anyway, love you and see you next chapter!  
**


	12. Not Again

**Read And Review!**

**A/N I really don't like this chapter, but I hope that you do... But you might dislike it as much as I do.  
**

**Dedicated to: Payton-Chan, as always! Thank you so much, my little butterfly. And my brand new friend: arianamarie valdez! And also for you, MidnightsFantasy! And to all my wonderful reviewers!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA!**

**Chapter Twelve:**

_Not Again_

Roy sucked in a deep breath. He knew this was it, this was his chance to tell Edward how he felt.

"But I love you, Edward." The words came out of his mouth before he could stop them.

Golden eyes widened in shock. Roy couldn't mean it. He couldn't really love him... Could he? No... No one could love him. Not when he was such a dirty sinner, no one could love him.

Not until he was clean.

"But you can't."

"And why can't I?" Roy challenged back.

Ed sighed, it was obvious why the colonel couldn't love him, why didn't the man see that? "Because I'm dirty and-"

Roy cut him off. "You are _not_ dirty and don't _ever_ say you are." He said in a dangerous tone. He didn't want Edward hurting himself or insulting himself. Edward was cutting himself down word by word...

Why couldn't the blonde see that the raven haired man loved him?

"But why would you love me? I'm not worth loving an-"

Once more, Roy cut the teen off. "You are worth loving. If you weren't, then I wouldn't love you. But I do love you." He persisted.

"_And_..." Edward continued his little speech. "There are many beautiful girls in Central that woul-"

Roy, ever the eager to prove to Ed that he only loved him, and no one else, cut him off for the third time. "But they are nothing compared to you. I don't love them, I love _you._ Why can't you see that?"

"I can't see it... Because it's too good to be true." Fullmetal answered honestly.

"No it's not... Just answer me this..." He paused and looked directly into Edward's beautiful golden eyes. "Do you love me?"

Edward sighed once more. He saw no reason to deny it. It wasn't like admitting that he loved his colonel would do his reputation any harm. "Yes. I love you."

Obsidian eyes widened. He hadn't been expecting that. The Flame Alchemist had been expecting a rant of angry words and swears on how he wasn't gay, how he could never love a 'morally bankrupt colonel bastard with a god complex'.

But Edward did.

So then why did he keep refusing?

"Why are you resisting Edward? Why can't you just let yourself be happy? Be happy with me..." He asked somberly.

"Because I don't deserve it."

Roy's level of irritation was rising. He just wanted to love Edward, and have Ed love him in return. "That's not true. You do deserve it. You deserve the best things in life."

Seeing Ed about to protest, Roy spoke quickly. "Even if you don't think so. I _know_ so."

"But I... I'm disgusting... Worthless. You deserve someone better than me." Edward said softly. He wanted Roy to love him... But he knew the colonel should have someone better then him. Someone who wasn't defiled like he was.

"You aren't disgusting. And how many times must I tell you that I don't want someone else, I only want you!" Roy said in desperation.

Ed was close to giving up, and allowing himself to become Roy's. "Really? Do you really think that? Do you really want only me?"

Roy smiled towards the teen. "Yes. I really think so. And yes. I only want you."

"But for how long?" Edward asked somberly. He needed to know how long he had with Roy until the older man grew sick of him. Before Roy realized just how dirty he really was.

The colonel looked straight into Edward's golden eyes, his own obsidian orbs filled to the brim with love. "Until you grow tired of me. And if you don't, then... Forever."

"You can't be serious..."

Roy's dazzling smile grew wider. "But I am."

"Why?" That one question from Edward's part made the room grow silent. "Why would you want me to be yours?"

Ed didn't understand why Roy would want him. After all, he was tarnished and used. Dirty and repulsive.

"That's a simple question Edward." Roy spoke softly as he slowly walked closer to the blonde. "The answer is... Because I love you. More than anything in this entire world. More than my own life."

"Why do you love me?" There was no reason that the older man should love the teen. He wasn't dashingly handsome, he wasn't perfect. He was used... Oh so dirty. He had a short temper and he tended to screw everything up. Everything. Why couldn't he do anything right?

"Now that... Is a foolish question." Roy said, still slowly closing the distance between them. "I love you because... You are you. There are too many reasons of why I love you... I couldn't say them all, for it would take too long."

And then the distance was closed.

Roy bent down to Ed's height, and captured the teen's lips with his own. They were soft and delicate, everything Roy had dreamed they would be. Edward closed his golden eyes, seeing as Roy already had and kissed the older man back.

Even though he was tarnished... He could still have this one moment, couldn't he?

Their lips pressed against each others, everything felt right. It was a sweet, chaste kiss.

And then it ended.

Edward was flushed a deep red, and a light pink had risen to Roy's own pale cheeks. Seeing the blonde's cheeks, Roy smirked.

"Believe me now, Fullmetal?" Roy asked, thoroughly enjoying the teen's embarrassment.

"Sh-shut up bastard." Edward replied shakily, his mind still lost in the kiss the two males had just shared.

There was a silence as the colonel waited for the major's answered.

Ed sighed in defeat. "Yes... I believe you."

Roy flashed a sparkling smile that would make any woman swoon. "Finally." And with that said, he pulled the short blonde to his muscular chest, enjoying the warmth he gave off his petite body.

"Now your mine. Only mine." Roy muttered as he leaned down and nuzzled Ed's golden hair with his nose.

"Does that mean I'm no longer Master's pet?"

Anger boiled inside of the Flame Alchemist. He held Edward tighter until his knuckles turned white. He swore upon himself... Edward would never get hurt by Envy again.

"No. Envy is a revolting creature. He is not your Master. No one is your Master. But... You are mine. You're my equal."

Edward seemed to accept that answer as he snuggled into Roy's chest.

Maybe... Just maybe... He could finally be happy again.

* * *

Envy narrowed his purple eyes from his position outside the window.

This did not please him.

His pipsqueak, with the flame colonel?

Oh... That would not do at all.

He had taken Fullmetal's virginity. Thus, the pipsqueak belonged to him, and not the colonel.

No. Edward belonged to no one but him.

Even if that meant he had to eliminate the competition to keep it that way.

Yes... Envy would show them both who Edward really belonged to.

And he would not lose.

Not again.

_TO BE CONTINUED!_

**Review! Hope you enjoyed!**


	13. Matter Of Time

**I have quite a few bit of followers for this story, and if each one of you (including guests) just took _two seconds_ to type "loved it" or whatever as a review, you could make me a lot happier! And the happier I am, the faster I update!  
**

**Dedicated to: Payton-chan, love you forever! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA!**

**Chapter Thirteen:**

_Matter Of Time_

Envy was not a happy homunculus. _His_ pipsqueak was in the arms of the flame colonel.

Did Envy have any romantic feelings for the Fullmetal Alchemist? No. Nothing of the sort... Envy wanted only one thing. To crush the Fullmetal pipsqueak's spirit and soul, break him.

Break him over and over again.

But he would wait. Wait until Flame and Fullmetal got closer. Wait until their bond seemed unbreakable. And then, he would make sure everything they had fell apart.

Edward was merely his new toy. A toy that would soon be broken, snapped into tiny pieces by his hand.

A sadistic grin spread it's way across his lips. Oh yes, he would enjoy breaking their bond. Filling it with betrayal and heartbreak.

But for now, he would wait.

* * *

Edward whimpered in his sleep. The dreams were back, plaguing him with his memories.

His memories of _that_ night. That night in the alley.

Only in this dream, there was no Roy to save him, the homunculus had killed him long ago. And the others... his friends on Mustang's team, they didn't save him either. They didn't want to.

They had said he deserved it.

He wanted to awake from these nightmares, these cruel twisted memories that lurked in his mind. But he knew he could not escape. Never. These memories would always be with him. No matter what he did to flee from them.

Edward tried to open his eyes, he didn't want to see these images anymore! He didn't want to relive this awful day again! No more, no more! He begged to the God he didn't believe in, let him wake up! Let him escape from these memories... if not just for a little longer.

Finally, he was able to open his golden eyes.

Why? Why did he have to see those images every time he closed his eyes? The memories of that night in the alley were always there, lingering behind his eyelids, for when he closes them, flashes of that night flood his mind.

He could never escape.

* * *

The scalding hot water poured on his body.

He needed to clean himself.

His eyes were open, why wouldn't the memories fade? Why couldn't he escape from them?

In his mind, he saw Envy thrusting into him. Thrusting, again and again. Never ending. Edward suppressed a scream at the memory. Why wouldn't these images go away?

He picked up the wooden scrub brush, and brought it to his arm, rubbing it back and forth.

_'Clean yourself. Make the sins go away. Your dirt, oh so dirty. Roy wouldn't stay with someone who's dirty.' _The little voice in the back of his mind whispered to him, giving him motivation to bring the brush to a faster scrubbing pace, to make the bristles rub against his skin harder.

Blood pricked the surface of his arm where he had just scrubbed away the layer of skin.

But he was not clean yet.

_'Roy won't stay with someone who's dirty. Dirty like you are.' _The voice whispered once more. Edward removed the brush from his arm that was being painted red with his blood, and moved the brush to a different location on his body, rubbing away at the layer of skin there.

He was scrubbing himself raw, and yet, he was still not clean.

He would never _truly_ be clean.

Edward muttered about how dirty he was under his breath. So dirty. He could practically see the dirt Envy left on him, laying on his skin, tainting him. Envy had made him dirty. He needed to be-rid himself of this filth that homunculus had left on him.

He needed to scrub it all away.

* * *

Roy groggily opened his obsidian eyes. The first thing he noticed was the lack of blonde in his arms. He questioned himself on where Edward could possibly be, scrambling through his sleepy brain for an answer.

At first, he rose to a panic, thinking Envy had gotten to his precious Edward, but then he heard the water in the shower running. He was going to ignore it, and fall back into sleep, when he remembered the last time Edward took a shower, and scrubbed himself raw.

He told himself to ignore that little memory, and go back to sleep, but his mind would not let him rest.

Finally, he got out of bed.

He walked into the hallway and stopped walking in front of the bathroom door. He felt he hadn't the need to knock and simply walked right in. The curtains were concealing the alchemist he knew was in the steaming shower. The colonel strode over and stood right outside of the shower curtain.

"Edward?" He called, alerting Edward that he was there.

There was no reply, and once more he called out for his lover. After once more receiving no answer, he pulled back the shower curtain, and saw Edward, a dazed look in his eyes, furiously scrubbing at his skin, turning it an angry pink color or even to the point of bleeding.

"Edward stop that!"

But Fullmetal did not cease his scrubbing. Memories were flashing in his head, playing those tormenting scenes over and over again on a loop in his mind.

"Edward!" Roy called as he reached out into the burning water. He briefly recalled his actions like this from the previous day. Successfully grabbing the automail hand and forcing it away from the abused skin, he grabbed a towel nearby and swiftly wrapped it around the petite teen and pulled the wet Edward to his chest.

The blonde snapped out of his trance. The memories were gone, for now. He had finished cleaning himself for the day. Roy was here now.

"Roy?" Edward asked shakily.

The raven haired man looked downwards to his lover. "Edward, what did I tell you about doing this to yourself?"

"I-I wasn't going to... until the memories came back..." He said softly. "And I realized you wouldn't love me if I wasn't clean." He whispered, just barely loud enough for Roy's ears to hear.

"I will _always_ love you, Edward." The older man said with a smile as he kissed Edward's still damp forehead. "Always. No matter what happens to you. No matter how much automail you have, and definitely no matter how dirty you think you are. You aren't dirty to me, and I will never think of you as such."

The tone Edward spoke in was one of disbelief. "Really, Roy? Will you really always love me? No matter what? No matter how dirty I am?" He asked, looking up at the taller man.

Roy smiled and leaned down to kiss the top of Edward's golden head. "You aren't dirty. And yes... always. Remember that Edward. I will always love you. So don't go scrubbing yourself like this anymore." He said as he lifted the irritated arm from Edward's side, and placed a kiss on that as well.

When Roy stood back to his full height, Edward leaned upwards closing the distance between Roy's mouth and his own. "As long as you remember... that I will always love you too."

And then the distance was closed, Edward's lips matched with Roy's own. A chaste kiss as an unspoken vow of their love. The kiss was pure and seemed ever lasting... like their love.

Or what they wished it could be.

But a certain homunculus was going to do all that he could... to rip that bond down.

And break his new toy.

He wouldn't have to wait much longer... before everything would be in place... and he could tear Fullmetal's heart apart, and sew it back up with hatred and despair.

Yes, it was only a matter of time.

_TO BE CONTINUED_

**Now please, take those two seconds to review for me! X3**

**Hope you enjoyed!**


	14. His Toy, His Heart

**Thank you to all of you who review! I love my reviewers so much! And I hope you love me too! Fireworks for all my darling reviewers!  
**

**Dedicated to: Payton-chan, looooveeee yooouuu!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA!**

**Chapter Fourteen:**

_His Toy, His Heart_

Edward and Roy walked down the street, hand in hand. Neither of them caring who looked at them with puzzled or disturbed expressions. They heard the whispers about their age difference. They heard the whispers about their gender. They heard all the whispers. But, nothing could deter them... because, they were in love.

Hours had passed since the shower incident. And now, Edward was sure Roy really loved him.

He knew he wasn't dirty.

The Flame Alchemist had said he wasn't dirty, so that means he wasn't dirty, right?

After feeling a reassuring squeeze on his flesh hand, Edward was positive.

He wasn't dirty.

But even if he was... it didn't matter.

It didn't matter because Roy loved him.

"Hey Edward..." Roy began, "why don't we go to a small bakery I know? It's a favorite place of mine to go on days like this." He finished, looking at the dazzling golden sun.

Roy couldn't help but notice how the sun was not nearly as beautiful as the alchemist walking beside him.

"Sure, Roy, as long as you're paying." Edward said with a smile.

The colonel rolled his eyes dramatically. "Of course, using me for free food, are you, Fullmetal?" He joked with a smile.

"Why else would I be with you?" Edward retorted with a smirk.

* * *

Purple eyes, filled with malicious intent blinked curiously. They were going to a bakery? A shit-eating grin made it's way across his lips. He could have fun with this.

He could find a new way to break his toy.

* * *

It took the two males a while to finally get to the small bakery, and when they arrived the walked inside, hands still together. Very few people were inside. As they walked to the counter to order, the only sales clerk, a woman clad in a skimpy skirt and revealing shirt, that now held no appeal to Roy, raised her dainty hand as if to stop them for walking any closer.

"Sorry..." She said in a nasal tone, eying their entwined hands. "We don't serve queers."

The younger of the two lovers eyes widened. This was his fault. If he hadn't been holding Roy's hand, the sales lady wouldn't have said that, and refuse to serve them.

This was his fault.

The older of the two lovers eyes narrowed. How dare she. How dare that ugly _bitch_ say that to them? To Edward? She has no right to say things like that, to refuse to serve them. Even if they were gay, money was money. That slut can't say a thing.

"Do you know who I am?" Roy asked, straightening his posture, but keeping his hold on the blonde's hand nonetheless.

The sales clerk, who's name tag read Sarah, who looked if she was in her early twenties, popped the gum she was chewing loudly, and answered the question in the same nasal tone. "No-" She drawled out the vowel. "And why do I care?" Sarah asked, rolling her eyes as she examined her painted nails.

Roy smirked. She really was a stupid girl. He placed his free hand in his pocket of his casual pants and pulled out his silver pocket watch, his proof of being a state alchemist. "I'm colonel Roy Mustang, the Flame Alchemist; Hero of Ishval. And this is my partner, major Edward Elric, the Fullmetal Alchemist; Hero of the People."

A sadistic grin spread it's way across her lips. "Oh, so this is the _famous_ Fullmetal Alchemist... the one that was supposedly raped, correct?" A cold laugh bubbled out of her mouth. "I bet he was moaning like a common slut." Sarah said as she smirked cruelly at the couple.

No. He didn't. He never did that. Edward didn't want that! He was not a slut...

He was not a slut.

"Don't you ever speak that way of Edward!" Roy threatened, his glare becoming fiercer.

But Sarah did not listen. Her sadistic grin only grew. "I think that _dirty_ little boy deserved it. Whoever did that to him -which I bet it was on consensual agreement- has done a damn good job... breaking the Fullmetal Alchemist. That's a good one. Some 'hero of the people' he turned out to be..."

Oh, was Roy mad. Edward was practically shaking in his black boots, clinging on to Roy's jacket. Edward was trying to heal those scars Envy had left on him, so who did that bitch think she was, talking about a state alchemist, let alone Edward, in that way.

Roy would not stand for this. "I will not hesitate to burn you, and this pathetic little shop."

"Please remove your _queer_ selves from here." Sarah sneered at the couple.

"I see no reason to do such a thing." Roy retorted back at the annoying woman.

Edward didn't like the attention they were both receiving. Receiving because of _him. _He pulled on Roy's sleeve subtly. "Roy, we should just go..."

"I don't see why we should." Roy answered, still glaring at the sales clerk, and the other few customers that dared look in their direction.

They weren't supposed to be here, the looks the people gave them made that clear. The petite blonde was desperately trying to convince Roy to allow them to leave. This was all his fault. He couldn't go out in public anymore. He now knew the public acknowledged him as dirty boy.

The people that had once thought of him as a hero, now thought he was nothing more than a begging whore.

He could never leave his house again.

Envy had ruined that much for him. Envy had ruined everything.

"Roy, I want to go home." Edward demanded his boyfriend. He didn't want to be here, with all these eyes silently judging him.

The colonel sighed, he knew that this date had been ruined for them both by this bitchy sales clerk. He knew Edward wanted to go home now, the comments were getting to the blonde. He knew Edward was still extremely sensitive to that topic, he couldn't blame him for that. And Sarah- or whatever the fuck her name was- was only rubbing salt in the emotional wounds. Roy could feel Edward shifting under everyone's judgmental eyes.

And after all, what kind of man could say no to his boyfriend?

So, glaring once more at the sales clerk who ruined their date, and the people around them who had witnessed that event, he held on tightly to Edward's hand, and led the petite blonde outside.

* * *

As Edward and Roy left the bakery, Sarah smiled maliciously. Oh, that was so easy. She walked to the back of the store and slipped out of the back entrance.

It had been so easy.

Now, it was obvious that Fullmetal had not forgotten what had happen, Fullmetal was not over those memories.

Another sadistic grin played on her lips and then, there was a fizzle-like noise and red flashed around her.

"Finally, I can stop being so ugly." 'Sarah' said, examining her form.

A black skirt-like bottom, and a black shirt stopping just below the bottom of the chest. A black headband accessory, with red circles. (1) Purple eyes, filled to the brim with evil intentions.

And dark green palm tree-like hair.

For Envy, it had been easy enough to eliminate the_ real_ Sarah. And it had been even easier to convince everyone he was her. And the simplest thing that he had done was a few minutes ago, when Edward and Roy were there. He knew they had been planning to go eat there, and he had quickly killed the real Sarah, and took her place as the sales clerk of the day.

Then, when the two alchemist's came in, the rest was simple enough.

Rub salt in the wounds of the Fullmetal Pipsqueak.

Oh, his new toy was fun indeed. To see his face after all those words he had spoken.

And to break his toy again and again, that would be a dream.

A dream is a wish your heart makes. **(2)**

And his 'heart' wanted to break Edward. It didn't matter that his core was a Philosopher's stone, and not an actual heart. He still wanted this. Envy wanted to hear the screams of agony once more. To see the tears that would course down the tan cheeks as he once more ripped the pipsqueak apart, starting from the inside.**  
**

And his dream would soon come true.

That, he promised.

Envy's heart would get what it wanted. He would be fulfilled.

His toy _would_ be broken.

_TO BE CONTINUED_

**(1) Sorry if I didn't describe Envy's outfit nicely, I tried. If you have a better way to describe his outfit, tell me, and I'll fix that right up!**

**(2) I bet Cinderella never planned on that little line of her's to be used in this way... oh well, if I didn't ruin Cinderella for you, what kind of fanfiction writer would I be? **

**You want fireworks? Then review please! :3  
**


	15. Soon, Oh So Soon

**I promised you fireworks if you reviewed, so here they are, my precious reviewers! *Fireworks pop and shine in the distance* those were just for you, reviewers! Thank you all for reviewing, please leave a review for me once more!  
**

**Dedicated to: My darling twin sister, Payton-chan! Love you!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA!**

**Chapter Fifteen:**

_Soon, Oh So Soon_

Edward squeezed Roy's hand tighter. He could _feel_ the eyes watching him, silently judging him, laughing at him. Making him a mockery.

Everyone knew what had happened to him that night.

Roy's arm was wrapped around his shoulder, dragging him forward. He would have surely frozen under the citizens cold, calculating gaze if Roy had not been there to keep dragging him onward, pushing him forward.

They were on their way home, seeing as their date had been ruined by that bitch in the bakery. The colonel sighed. This date he had been planning to take Edward on had originally seemed so promising... but it had all fallen apart, just like everything else.

All because of Envy.

Envy had ruined everything.

The two lovers walked home, Roy's arm still around the petite blonde's shoulder, a sad silence laying in the air around them. Sad because they knew...

That Edward might never be able to heal his emotional wounds.

* * *

Envy smiled from his spot in the tree near the sidewalk where his toy and the flame colonel were walking. Breaking the Fullmetal Alchemist was certainly more fun then he had ever thought it would be. At first, he had simply been doing this because he could. But now, now this was for his own personal enjoyment.

Soon, soon he would break the bond that had grown between Flame and Fullmetal. Soon, soon he would break his toy, shatter Edward into a dozens of pieces, never to be repaired.

Soon, oh so soon.

* * *

It had been a few weeks and, contrary to what they both had thought, Edward was becoming himself, healing his wounds much faster then either of them had thought possible. Edward had to admit, his boyfriend, Roy, was helping him heal much faster then he ever could have on his own.

Daily, Roy would tell him how much he loved him. Every morning, Roy would wake up early to prepare breakfast for his Edward before the blonde had awoke. Every time it seemed like things were too hard, Roy would be there to tell him that things would get easier, he just had to be patient. Every night, Roy would kiss his forehead and hold him close as they slept, protecting him from harm. Protecting him from the nightmares that dared to enter his mind.

Roy was always there for him.

Not once had Roy called him dirty.

He wasn't dirty. Not at all. He was just as clean as the people around him. Roy knew that, Roy saw that. Other people may see him as filthy... But in Roy's beautiful eyes, he was sparkling clean. And that... that was good enough for Edward.

That was all Edward needed.

"Edward, dinner is ready." Roy called to Edward from the kitchen.

The blonde alchemist got up from his spot on the couch and strode into the kitchen, his nose sniffing the delicious aroma around him. He would have never guessed that Roy could be such a good cook, but then again, what's a world without surprises?

"Whatcha make?" Edward questioned, licking his lips and walking over to stand beside his boyfriend, who was slaving over a pot on the stove.

Picking up a porcelain bowl, Roy answered. "Stew, your favorite." The raven haired man ladled steaming hot stew into the bowl.

Edward simply smiled in return, gratefully accepting the bowl offered to him. He walked to the dining room table, his automail foot clinking against the hardwood floor. Pulling out the chair of his choice, he plunked himself in his seat, and began digging into the delightful stew with the metal spoon Roy had placed at the table for him.

Roy had barely made it a to the halfway point of his own stew bowl by the time the blonde was extending his bowl to Roy, his molten golden eyes begging for his third helping. The Flame Alchemist sighed they had gone through this once before, when Edward wanted his second helping. After a moment of staring back into those golden orbs defiantly, Roy admitted defeat and walked back to the kitchen to refill his lover's bowl. He couldn't say no to Edward like that. If Edward wanted him to get his stew instead of getting up and fetching his own stew, then so be it. The colonel knew he was spoiling the Fullmetal Alchemist, but he thought that after all that had happened, the boy deserved some spoiling, and Roy was more than happy to be the one who got the privilege of spoiling Edward.

Anything for Edward.

Roy brought the porcelain bowl, full of hot stew, back to the patiently waiting Edward. The younger eagerly snatch the bowl up, placing spoonfuls of the wondrous food inside his mouth, sighing happily as he swallowed it. Roy smiled into the cup of water he was drinking. He was glad that he, of all people, was able to make Edward so happy, with such a simple thing as homemade stew.

Edward placed the bowl down on the table, the hole that was his stomach finally filled. He rested his flesh hand on the table. Roy put his glass down on the table and gently lifted his own pale hand, placing it on top of Edward's tan hand. Obsidian and gold stared at each other, neither saying a word. Just the faintest of smiles tracing their lips.

They really were happy together, there was no denying that.

The two males just wished they could always stay this happy, this in love.

But wishes... they never do come true, now do they?

_TO BE CONTINUED_

**Review please! I hope you liked it! I updated as soon as I could, sorry it's a short chapter! I will update soon, right after I update Through Hell And Back, and I'm also currently working on the first chapter of a brand new RoyEd fanfiction of mine! Yayyyy!**


	16. Painfully Alone

**If you reviewed, you proved that you love me, and this story! YAY!**

**Dedicated to: Payton-chan because she's always there for me. LOVE YOU! And, a special thank you to fullmetalfan2, for drawing me my first fanart for Extinguished Flames!  
**

**A/N Sorry, I just started school and I got a job, so it's hard for me to find time to write. Why do I never tell you guys in advance? I don't know, I'm an asshole like that. And because I've been writing my new RoyEd fanfiction, Red Snowflake, before writing this one.  
**

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA!**

**Chapter Sixteen:**

_Painfully Alone_

The phone rung early the next morning, disturbing the colonel from his peaceful sleep. He was currently snuggling with a sleeping Fullmetal Alchemist, so his level of desire to move away from his lover and answer the phone was currently level... Zero.

Oh god, he really did not want move.

But unfortunately, he knew there was only one person who would call this early.

Riza Hawkeye.

And that meant that he better get the fuck up and answer the phone before there was a gun pressed against his temple. Groaning, he unwrapped his arms from the sleeping blonde's waist, and removed himself from the bed, grumbling about how unfair life was.

Yawning, he walked down the stairs slowly making his way to the phone. On the last ring, he answered the phone, pressing it against his ear.

"Hello?" He asked in a yawn, even though he already knew who it was.

"It's me, colonel." Came the expected voice of the First Lieutenant, Riza Hawkeye.

"What are you calling for?"

The stern, yet feminine voice echoed from the other line. "Sir, I suggested you take leave while Edward was recovering, correct?"

He nodded, knowing she couldn't see it. "Yeah..." He drawled, waiting for her to elaborate.

Sighing, she asked her next question. "Edward is feeling better now, am I right? It has been weeks, after all."

"He's starting to feel better after the _incident_, you are correct." He answered, starting to finally awake.

"It's time for you to come back to work now, sir."

Time seemed to freeze as those words came from the other end of the phone. Going back to work would mean leaving Edward alone in his home. It wasn't that he didn't trust Edward to remain here by himself, it was that he was afraid that Edward would be upset about him leaving, even though it was for work. He knew Edward didn't like being alone since the _incident_.

"But Edward..." Roy muttered softly, his concern for the blonde showing in his voice.

Another sigh was heard from the other end of the line. "Yes sir, I know very well that you don't wish to leave Edward home alone, but unfortunately, you don't have a choice... I've given you the maximum amount of time off you can have. There are papers with deadlines that need to be signed by you today. Papers from the Fuhrer as well."

Rubbing the bridge of his nose, he mentally sighed. How would Edward take this news? Roy had never thought about the day that would come when he had to return to work. Return to work without Edward by his side.

"Wait a damn second... Why can't I take Edward with me?" He asked, stupefied that he hadn't thought of that solution beforehand.

"Sir, if I let you bring Edward to work with you, you would never get any work done." She answered, as though it was obvious.

Whining a bit more than a grown man should, Roy questioned again. "What does that mean? Of course I'd get my work done." He argued back, trying to defend himself.

"Uh huh..." Riza said in a disbelieving tone. "Edward would distract you all day and you know it."

For a moment Roy thought. Sadly, he had to admit that it was probably true. He would be distracted by Edward... He wouldn't want Fullmetal to even leave his sight, he would always be worried that something would happen to the petite teen.

But imagining leaving Edward here, alone? Imagining that was hell.

Just what would happen to Edward if he left him here?

The horrors that his mind came up with was unbearable. With a silent shudder, he went back to putting his attention on his phone conversation with his First Lieutenant.

"You're probably right... But I don't want to leave Edward alone..."

"I know you don't sir, but I bet he'll be just fine... He's a great alchemist now isn't he? He'll be fine." The trigger happy woman promised her colonel.

"Yeah, you're right... I'll tell Edward I have to go to work today. I'll be there within the next hour or so." And with that, the Flame Alchemist hung up on Riza.

* * *

Edward awoke to the feeling of a hand roughly shaking his shoulder. The sound of his name echoed in his ears, and he recognized the voice of his lover. Opening his blurry molten gold eyes, he blinked at the figure looming over him.

"Roy?" Edward questioned in a yawn. "What time is it? And just what are you doing?" He asked, referring to the offending hand that was still lingering on his left shoulder.

"Waking you up." Roy answered curtly, waiting for his lover to remove himself from their bed.

Moments later, a groggy blonde slowly placed a single leg on the floor, gradually slipping out from the warm and rather comfortable bed he had been happily sleeping in. Rubbing his eyes, he adjusted his gaze to the colonel.

"So... Why the hell did you wake me up?"

"To tell you something." The older of the two answered plainly.

Rolling his golden eyes, he looked at his lover and asked in a monotone voice "and what do you want to tell me so damn badly?"

Exhaling, Roy prepared himself to make the announcement. Golden eyes stared at him blankly, and his thoughts briefly wandered to how the blonde teen would react to the sudden news. "I have to go back to work."

"Okay." Edward replied, sounding bored.

Confused obsidian eyes studied the teenager sitting in front of him. "Okay? That's it?"

"Yeah. I mean, you're taking me with you, right?" He asked as though the solution was obvious.

Roy paused. He had to say it... He had to tell him what Riza told him to say. "No Edward. You can't come."

"But why the hell not!?" The Fullmetal Alchemist protested immediately. Why couldn't he go? He didn't want to be left all alone here... No... Not alone. Not again. He had to be by Roy's side. It wasn't safe otherwise. He didn't want to be alone.

The colonel rubbed his face, to tired to put up with this arguing in the morning. "Because Hawkeye said so."

Edward's fear got the best of him and he started to yell, his heart pounding. "Well why do you have to do everything she says! YOU'RE THE COLONEL!"

"I'm doing what's best for my work. You'll just distract me if I bring you along."

The blonde lowered his head, and his voice along with it. "I see. Just..." He raised his head, but his voice remained quiet. Tears threatened to prick his eyes, his emotions getting out of hand as memories flooded back to him. He was just a distraction, after all. "Just try to come back for lunch to see me, alright?" Forcing a small smile onto his face.

Roy smiled, glad this had been settled with a smile. "Yeah, I promise I'll be back for lunch, alright?" Kissing the blonde atop the head, he bid himself farewell, Edward waving goodbye from the doorstep.

* * *

As soon as he shut the door, his world came crashing down upon him. He didn't want to be alone. Never again. He knew this was a stupid, childish fear of his to be left alone... But after what happened... No, no, he couldn't afford to think like that. Nothing would happen to him, he knew that. But he couldn't help but feel the thump of his accelerating heartbeat from within his ribcage as he thought about the consequences of being left all alone here.

Why did he have to be all alone?

Maybe he should have begged Roy to take him to work. Maybe he should have pleaded to not be left alone. Maybe if he had done that, he wouldn't be sitting here on the cold floor, head between his knees, tears stinging his once fiery golden eyes. But he hadn't... He hadn't begged nor plead, so now here he was, stuck in this house by himself, alone with his torturous thoughts.

The thoughts that were slowly killing him.

_To Be Continued_

_**A/N Now, listen here. I had originally planned for this chapter to be super long, like 3,000 words. But I haven't updated for one month and twenty two days. That's right, I keep track. I apologize, I've just had a lot of stress right now. I'm doing my best. But, when I take too long to update, please, do me a favor and PM me or leave me a review yelling "UPDATE ALREADY BITCH!" So it doesn't completely slip my mind. Thanks.**_

_**Love,**_

_**HDA**_


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